The One About Learning the Hard Way

Dear Mart,

It's me again. And boy, you just don't listen, do you? Didn't I give you a list of things (not) to do while studying for an exam? Wow, you're more stubborn than I thought. I guess that epicfail last semester didn't really leave much of a mark on your swagger, huh? Jeebus.

Dawg, on the serious tip now. You can't just keep pissing your study time away whilst assuming that you're always gonna land on your feet. One of these days, you're gonna land square on that inflated f'n head of yours, for real for real. Trust me on this.

Sigh. Here's hoping that exam was merely an aberration, and that we can make a better team come Finals time. Don't let me down, kid.

- brain..

END COMMUNICATION.

The One After a Short Hiatus

I haven't blogged in a while.

There's something entirely unwholesome about working on Stats at three in the morning.

I heard of the TANKEST end-of-Year 12 prank in history. The students got one letter each on their jerseys, and when put together, it spelled out "Fuck you Mr. [Whatevertheprincipal'snamewas]." Fugging oarsome.

A week's break is nowhere near enough. There's a boatload of things I wanna get through during this break. Here's hoping I have enough time.

Putting sticky notes on my desktop actually helps me to focus. A little bit.

I want NBA 2K9. WWE SmackDown! vs. Raw 2009.

Summer = Australia? The Philippines? The United States of America? Afghanistan?

As fast as it's gone, I'm still quite sick of this semester. Is it November yet?

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

The One About My Potential Career Choices

I'm not feeling completely swaggerific today, so I'm gonna try and cheer myself up with a completely nonsensical entry.

Like, say, imagining myself as different kinds of superheroes. This'll be fun.

NOTE: Inspired by boredom, and Chandler Bing ("If I were a superhero that could fly, AND be invisible, that would be the best."), in equal parts.


Obsessive-Compulsive Man

• Description:
  Replete with trusty cleaning belt (comprised of antiseptic hand wash, rubbing alcohol, foldable mop/broom combo and disposable wipes), mess has just met its match! Unstoppable in his ability to re-arrange everything (and I mean EVERYTHING) into right angles, height order, date and/or frequency of use. Got a problem with organisation? Take it up with his Perfect Alignment Ruler.
• Strengths:
  Amazing sense of his surroundings; able to spot the smallest imperfections.
• Weaknesses:
  Anal-retentive myopia: once he sees a mess, he can't help but clean it. It's a disease, is what it is.

Captain Slacker

• Description:
  The robot programmed to make its own life as easy as possible. It excels at avoiding any and all forms of industry. It has a penchant for being in the right place at the right time, and is prone to good fortune. Some people may say lazy; Captain Slacker says "working smart, not hard." Downfall? What downfall?
• Strengths:
  Unflappable confidence, no matter the odds. Always manages to land on its feet, even in times of duress.
• Weaknesses:
  Unflappable confidence, no matter the odds. Also, allergic to hard work.

KidAwesome

• Description:
  Picture the world's most awesome person. The multiply his swagger by a hundred thousand trillion (100000000000000000). Bingo.
  
• Strengths:
  Commands an army/fanbase of 100 billion people. So that would be everyone on Earth, plus all the extraterrestrials them scientists is always talkin' about. Also, possesses a mastery of Ebonics. Knahmsayin'? Word.
• Weaknesses:
  None. Wait...nope, none.

On second thought, screw this. Who wants to be the hero? It's so much easier (not to mention a helluva lot more fun) being the villain. You don't have to worry about being a decent person or trying to get on everyone's good side. Plus, you get to piss everyone off. I would much rather be the evil, conniving, obnoxious, malevolent, despicable, cocky, nigh-invincible brat prince.

If that means I drive everyone away, then so be it. After all, in the immortal words of Dr. Perry Cox, "The only way to be respected...as a man is to be an island. You are born alone, and you damn sure die alone."

Over and out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

The One About the Love Lockdown

I'm sure you guys have seen the performance by now. (That beating heart on the blazer? HA! Untouchable.)

It's sure to be one of his most divisive songs; it's another Yeezy x Auto-Tune collabo, minus actual rapping. I'm betting a whole mess of people are gonna be less than ecstatic about this song, whilst the rest of us are gonna hail it as one of this year's most addictive and captivating songs.

Go ahead and place me firmly square in the middle of the latter group. Shotgun bandwagon? Hells nah, son. Everyone else can have shotgun. We've been driving the damn thing for five years.

"I'm in love with you, but the vibe was wrong. And that haunted me, all the way home."

"So you never know, never never know. Never know enough, 'til it's over, love. 'Til we lose control, system overload, screaming, 'No, no, no, no, no.'"

"See, I wanna move, but can't escape from you. So, I keep it low, keep a secret code, so everybody else don't have to know."

"I can't keep my cool, so I keep it true."

"I can't keep myself and still keep you, too."

"How many times did I tell you before it finally got through? You lose."

"I've got no one new. I know I said I'm through, but got love for you. But I'm not lovin' you the way I wanted to."

"Only God knows if I'll be with you. Baby, I'm confused. You choose."

"Where I wanna go, I don't need you. I've been down this road too many times before."

Call me a sucker for Auto-Tune, but in my ever so humble opinion, the way dude uses it, he makes it sound SUPER OFFICIAL. It really augments the emotion behind his music when he uses it properly. I know he can't sing, but if he keeps this kinda shit up, I'm willing to look past that. That's not why I idolise him, anyway. It's because he's utterly trippindicular, and in the immortal words of Paul Levesque, he's just that damn good.

Over and out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

The One About My New Motto

"TOO DOPE TO MOPE."

My swag is currently at nigh-unfuckwittable levels. My awesomeness meter just exploded.

Let's just leave it at that.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

The One About Why I Does What I Does

"Impact bias refers to the difficulty people have in predicting the intensity and duration of their emotions following an emotion-causing event."

Paraphrased that from my lecture notes. Basically, it means that we as a human race suck at predicting how badly we'd react to an emotional event.

One of the specific examples we were given was how we're more likely to overestimate our reactions to relationships gone wrong. Once a breakup occurs, we tend to assume a hopeless perspective. You know, the whiny, emo, "Oh, I'm never going to get over it, this is the worst thing to ever happen to me," stage.

But, sure enough, as dictated by what people have found through studying the inner workings of people's affect, cognitions and behaviours, we eventually just...get over it. And usually, sooner than we ever thought possible. It just comes out of nowhere. We just wake up one day thinking, "It's a good fucking day."

And that's why I'm taking Psych.

The One with the Open Letter

Dear Mart,

This is your brain speaking. Next time, try not to leave me hanging. You know, you might not want to avoid studying until the early hours of the morning, when I'm flatlining on you. And if you feed me notes during your lectures, I won't be so malnourished come exam time.

Speaking of lectures, attendance isn't illegal. Keep that in mind. It's not a Mafia meeting. You don't get in trouble for being there.

Also, if you can, try to refrain from the following things when you're supposed to be studying:

• Facebook
• MSN/Yahoo! (even though you're offline)
• YouTubing Pistol Pete Maravich highlights
• YouTubing Larry Bird highlights
• YouTubing NBA 2K clips
• Actually, just YouTube altogether
• Downloading The Writing's on the Wall-era Destiny's Child songs
• Downloading songs from old NBA Live soundtracks
• Downloading Ja Rule video clips
• Actually, just downloading altogether
• Looking up rappers on Wikipedia
• RapReviews
• OHHLA
• Hypebeast/High Snobiety/Nice Kicks/etc. etc.
• SLAMonline
• ESPN.com
• IGN
• iTunes
• Actually, just the Favorites tab altogether

Finally, if you get a good night's sleep and eat regularly, I tend to function more effectively. Just a thought.

Sincerely,

- brain..

P.S. Hot chicks, basketball, shoes. Gotcha.

END COMMUNICATION.

The One Where I Complain for No Good Reason

MUGGERFUCKER! Baaaaad morning today. Let the whining commence!

• Definitely did not get enough sleep. I had a Social Psychology exam at 11AM this morning. Naturally, by 1:30AM, I still had three iLectures remaining on my checklist. Score! Reassured myself that I always pull through come exam time, and that I'll be able to drag my four-hours-of-sleep-havin' ass out of bed. End result: EPICFAIL! Had to quickly rush rush out of the house in like 10 minutes and park the car at Blacktown just to BARELY make it to the express train. Oversleep is fudged in the face.
  
• Totally spaced on the fact that there were two rooms for the exam. Of course, I ended up in the wrong room. Sitting happily in Biomed D, I was rocked back to consciousness by the words "If your last name starts with M-Z, you should be in Biomed B." Good job, Pags. If the two rooms were mucho distant from each other, I would've been d-d-d-deaded.
• Definitely should've studied harder for that exam. I worked hard enough to remember the basic/general stuff, but once it got down to the nitty gritty detailed content, my brain just bailed on me. Self-handicapping's only fun when you axe it in the end! Sonofabitch! Oh well, can't help but laugh now.

Over and out!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

The One Where I Put the Camera to Great Use

Found a new way to procrastinate: taking photos of things around me, or whatever else may come to mind. Started it over the weekend whilst studying for Stats, then decided to tune out for the last 10 minutes of Psych to keep it going. HA!

1. Studying, eh? Then why do you have Facebook open? HA! LIAR!
2. Studying, eh? Then why do you have MSN open? LIAR AGAIN! Being on 'appear offline' doesn't count!
3. Study aids. Orange Gatorade and a bottle of Black Label. Effective!
4. Notes. I think. They helped out a fair bit.

5. SLAM magazine. Essential for distraction!
6. Ditto for the basketball. =D
7. What the hell? Is this what studying does to my room? This is about as messy as my room ever gets.

8. This is where I stopped doing my work. Hooray. Didn't even make it to HALF a page.

9. Black Label and Gatorade. These are supposed to keep me refreshed while studying.

10. Psychology of Language lecture. The idea to tune out struck me when my lecturer started talking about "MILFs." He was actually referring to "MILPHS," a non-word he made up. But hey, score one for immaturity! =D

11. Forty-five minutes worth of notes. I was going SO well until I got distracted. HAHA!

12. The Psych of Language take-home exercise that was due today. I started at 9PM last night. Effort x30.

13. Another method of procrastination: scribbling lyrics onto a blank page. This is nowhere near dunzo, but it's coming along nicely.

14. Ahh, Stats. Designated nap time. It even says so on my book!

15. Anne Rice's Tales of the Body Thief. Veeeerrryyyy slowly making my way through it. Nearly two years in, and I've barely read like...a hundred pages?
16. My iPod. My battered, battered iPod.
17. The same Lacoste bag I've been using ever since I started Uni. Durable, what up!

18. My favourite pair of shoes. =D Almost two years worth of love dedicated to this pair.
19. Edwin jeans tucked behind the tongue.

20. Purple theme. Swagger on a hundred...

21. ...thousand...

22. ...trillion.

23. =| Have they started faking 10Deep? If they have, I might be very, very sad.

24. The destroyed iPod. Scratched so badly, I can barely make out the writing.
25. "Let me see what we have tonight: I'm high as a satellite. I see those flashing lights."

26. Back home. One last vanity shot to top it all off. Head-to-toe, of course. =D Ahh, that BAPE hoodie. Why was I in a "let's wear clothes from 2006" mode today?

Dunzo, sleep time. Over and out!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.