Corpus Invictus

The Year In...

2012-01-27T10:37:00.000+11:00

2011

After almost a month into 2012, it's time for me to look back on the year that was.

Shoes: Nike Air Foamposite One (Dark Neon Royal/White-Black)

Seeing as this was my first full year of having a steady income, I finally had a way to fuel my voracious appetite for shoes. And there was no better way to kick off my shoe-buying spree than with my favourite pair of all time. These are the shoes I've wanted since 1997, when I was around nine years old. I remember looking these up online in the past years and cursing the $600+ price tag. When I found out they were being released early last year, for about half the price, I didn't even think twice. The Holy Grail was mine.

Other memorable pairs:

Nike Zoom Kobe VI (Grey/White-Del Sol-Black) and (Purple/Black-White) - Best birthday presents ever from my big bro and my friends, respectively
Air Jordan IV (CDP) - My goodness. I can stare at these for days.
Nike Air Foamposite One (Black/Red Ice) - I bought myself another pair of foams to match our uniform. It turns out that these take a lot to break in, and in the meantime, your feet WILL be in tremendous pain. Still waiting for these to be court ready.

Nike Shox Air Hyperballer (Black/Black) - Almost all-black everything.
Vans 106 Moc CA (Sudan Brown) - My first nice pair of tan suede shoes. These would be good for summer if the weather gods weren't delirious right now

Song: The Silent Comedy - Bartholomew

I was hooked on this song from the first time I heard it. It's not a catchy song by any means, but personally, I loved the eerie, medieval-era judgement day theme in the lyrics.

Also, I couldn't stop watching this trailer. To me, this song is forever associated with one of the best games I've ever played. It's Undead Soldier-killing music.

Other memorable songs:

Kanye West - Gorgeous
Kanye West - Lost in the World
Kanye West - All of the Lights
Jay-Z and Kanye West - Ni**as in Paris
Jay-Z and Kanye West - Otis
Jay-Z and Kanye West - Gotta Have It
Death Cab for Cutie - Monday Morning
Death Cab for Cutie - Some Boys
Death Cab for Cutie - Stay Young, Go Dancing
YC - Racks (Remix)
Big Sean feat. Kanye West - Marvin Gaye and Chardonnay
California Swag District - Teach Me How to Dougie
Wiz Khalifa - Black and Yellow
Trey Songz - Invented Sex
Drake - Headlines
Kid Cudi - Mojo So Dope
Kid Cudi - MANIAC
Kid Cudi - Mr Rager
Band of Skulls - Death by Diamonds and Pearls
Manchester Orchestra - Simple Math
Soft Bullets - Rescue Radio
Gotye - Somebody I Used to Know
Sneaky Sound System - Big

Album: Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Tuesday, December 14, 2010. I was driving to work, and as usual, I was stuck in traffic (and most probably running late). MBDTF had been out for a couple of months by this point, but I hadn't yet had time to sit down and properly listen to it in its entirety. After hearing bits and pieces on the way to the Clipse concert a few days prior, I finally decided to give it a full listen.

Whether or not this is Kanye's best album is debatable. However, it stands as my personal favourite because although some may argue against the glut of musical layers, I feel that it works (wonderfully) because all the different elements complement each other so well. The well-placed samples, the nigh-operatic feel in certain songs, the grandeur, the arrogance, the complexity, the return to "proper" rapping, the sincere emotion and sentiment. Kanye succeeded in making a classic album because of his ability to balance all of the spinning musical plates, with none of these coming close to being subpar.

Then again, I'm a biased Kanye fan. Do with that what you will.

Games:

After two years of being a lazy gamer, I finally reconnected with my inner "14-year-old fat kid who loves his PlayStation." First point of order was to get the HD port of my PS3 repaired so I could return to playing with awesome graphics. Once that was sorted, I moved my PS3 back to my room, and went about buying a bunch of new games.

Best game of the year has to be a tie between WWE 12 and Dark Souls. WWE 12 was an awesome rebirth for the franchise, and I think they really nailed the balance between great gameplay and immersive features.

Dark Souls, on the other hand, is an unforgiving beast of a game that really tests your patience, skill and resilience. I am actually frightened of playing this game, and having to face the failures again. But it keeps you coming back for more, just to feel the rush of accomplishment. I WILL finish this game in 2012.

NBA 2K12
ICO & Shadow of the Colossus Classics HD
Dark Souls
WWE 12

Recap:

All in all, 2011 was a great year. It didn't start out that way, and it took a while for me to get into a good place after all emotions subsided. But once I got into a more positive mindset, things really started opening up for me. I made a point to learn from my mistakes, and to be more receptive to trying new things. I expect this to continue in 2012.

One thing that I took away from this year is that I love all of my friends. I've gone on at length in the past about how much I love my friends, but I think this year I really learned to appreciate their company, given I couldn't see them as often anymore because of full-time work. They were there to cheer me up and listen to my rants about my relationship issues and they helped me to realise I was (am) better off.

And not just my guys, too. I realised this year that I love having close female friends too, because they help me see things from a different perspective. Getting sisterly advice (and in Jess' case, actual medical advice) from the girls is something I definitely appreciate. So shout outs to Jess, Marione, Jes, Jessie and all the other girls in the crew!

Memories:

The fights, oh the fights!
Getting adjusted to being single again
Finally getting my hands on the Holy Grail, after 14 years
Jamberoo road trip with the guys
Helping my best friend deal with a breakup, while I was still trying to process my own
Three straight weeks of going to Marble Bar
Karaoke for Matt and Jessie's. We turned that place into our own personal club!
Impromptu jersey party for Pat's birthday
Getting awesome surprise Kobes from my big bro and the crew
Birthday party at Red Room
Cristian's birthday...at Marble Bar
Temporary lapses in concentration and subsequent confrontations
Vivid Festival with Joy
Snow Trip with the guys
Getting spotted! XOXO
Mousty party for Reyes' birthday
Hunter Valley Day Trip!
Running a 10 kilometre marathon! This was awesome.
Trips to Freshwater, whenever the weather cooperated
The return of the Annual Belated Halloween Party
Terrigal Beach House Trip. Miss you, Central Coast!
Combined Christmas/Farewell Party for Matt, Jessie, Reyes and Ria
Watching Jess graduate! Congrats again, Dr Nghiem!
A much needed 10-day break from work
NYE party at Jeanie's to finish off the year

Quotes to sum up 2011:

"Life is sweet in the belly of the beast."

This quote is to remind me to appreciate life, even when it feels boring/monotonous/frustrating. There's always something to be happy about.

"I'm lost in the world, I'm down on my mind, I'm new in the city and I'm down for the night."

And this quote is to sum up my attitude for 2011: if you've got plans, count me in. Up for anything!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Retrospectives, Part II

2012-01-21T15:52:00.002+11:00

2010

Shoes: Clarks Desert Boots (Black)

This was the first pair of shoes I bought in 2010, on my very last night in NYC. I would put these along with my Supreme canvas shoes as the most versatile pairs of shoes I've ever had. They work for everyday work use, for semi-formal occasions, for nights out in the city, with jeans and with shorts. Ridiculously comfortable, too. I need more pairs in my life.

Other memorable pairs:

Vanishing Elephant Fullerton (Maroon) - First pair of proper boat shoes, and in an awesome colour, too
Clae Romares (Black) - Bought myself a second pair since I vomited on the first

Song: Kanye West feat. Rick Ross, Jay-Z and Nicki Minaj

My initial reaction to Nicki's verse, 2 September 2010:

"Nicki Minaj's Monster verse just got me pregnant...with emotion."
Other memorable songs:

Kanye West - Power
Kanye West - Runaway
Drake - Find Your Love
Craig David - Insomnia
Katie Costello - I Can't Fix Us Two
Priscilla Ahn - A Good Day (Morning Song)
Priscilla Ahn - Dream
Gotye - Night Drive
Death Cab for Cutie - You Can Do Better Than Me
Gregory and the Hawk - Boats and Birds
Trey Songz - Can't Help But Wait
The Temper Trap - Love Lost

Academics:

I had my graduation ceremony on 15 March 2010, which basically meant the last four years of hard work was subsequently summarised by a few pieces of paper. Also, this was my first year as an Intern Psych at the College of Psychological Practice. Words can't describe how monotonous the registration process has been, to date. I do genuinely love learning about Psychology, and would equally love the chance to put this into practice, but as far as classes, workshops and assignments go, I would much rather not have to deal with it all.

Games:

As per 2009: "To be honest, 2009-2010 was a black hole in gaming. I went from constant gamer to someone who occasionally played pick up on NBA 2K9. No winner."

Recap:

Looking back, I think 2010 was a year where I did a lot of growing. A lot of that had to do with being in my first proper, grown-up relationship, and all that this entailed. The fights (verbal, emotional and unfortunately, physical), the numerous break-ups (and make-ups), the times when I had to really dig deep to figure out whether it was worth it, balanced out by the times when I felt we were unshakeable and that we were going to make it out alive. Everything that happened was part of the learning process. It's sad to think of how we ended, but more importantly, I realise now that we ended because we were supposed to.

The other, equally important part of my year was trying to find full-time employment. This was my first experience with job-seeking, and it was pretty tough. I even had to seek help from a job agency. In the end though, I lucked out and found a company willing to take a chance on an unproven, inexperienced University graduate. I say lucked because I found a role that was accepted for a full placement by the Psych Registration Board, a role that I enjoy and a role that lets me work with people I actually enjoy spending time with. Win, win, win.

Memories:

Leaving NYC and coming back to the sweetest welcome ever
Finding out that I hadn't been accepted into the Clinical Psychology Masters Program at UNSW, and having to think of a Plan B
Going to my first interview at COPP, and subsequently being accepted as an Intern
Mylee's birthday on a houseboat, and getting canoed back to shore at night. So freaky
Random trip to the Central Coast to end summer
Graduation!
The official beginning of my relationship with Angles
The birthday streak, on a lesser scale
My 22nd birthday at home, and my friends surprising me with suits and formal wear
My first trip to the Gold Coast and visiting DreamWorld, Wet n Wild and MovieWorld. So many rollercoasters
The World Cup and all associated hysteria (better luck in 2014, Team America)
Watching the Lakers exact revenge on Celtics and win back-to-back championships
Watching The Decision live on TV, and subsequently flipping out
Beepin' Joe!
Joining a gym! Never thought I'd see the day where I was a regular gym-attendee
Job applications, all day everyday. Not fun, not easy, but worth it in the end!
My first job interview. Nervous guy was nervous.
All subsequent job interviews. Confident guy was confident.
Winning another championship at Kevin Betts
Random trips to random places (Homebush, Blue Mountains, Balmain, Bondi, Breakfast on the Bridge etc)
Getting an offer from APM, and having my first day on the job, ever
Hunter Valley trip with the crew
14 December 2011 - Driving to a case conference. The first time I listened to MBDTF in its entirety. Life-changing.
Week-long trip to Victoria to end the year
Navigating Melbourne, piece of cake
Boxing Day Sales in Melbourne
Walking through Brunswick Street
Driving along the Great Ocean Road, all the sights and sounds
Not having any accommodation sorted while on the road, and settling for a dingy motel in Colac
The Elms Bed and Breakfast. Such a lucky find!

Quote to sum up 2010:

"You're my Devil, you're my Angel

You're my Heaven, you're my Hell

You're my now, you're my forever

You're my freedom, you're my jail

You're my lies, you're my truth

You're my war, you're my truce

You're my questions, you're my proof

You're my stress and you're my masseuse"

So many ups and downs. Like I said, it was a growing process. I came out of it alive and kicking. Definitely kicking. Pretty happy with how it all turned out!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Retrospectives, Part I

2012-01-12T22:57:00.000+11:00

I feel bad for ignoring my annual "The Year In..." entry for two years, so here are some quick summaries of 2009 and 2010 in bullet form. Complete 2011 summary to be added soon!

Best of 2009

Shoes: Supreme canvas (Burgundy)

Looking back, this pair, which I bought on my year-end trip, eventually became my most reliable and durable shoes. Over the past two years, I've probably used these (and my Clarks - more on these in 2010) the most since they're so versatile - work, casual or semi-formal, I put these on. And they can take a beating in the rain! I love my grape shoes.

Other memorable pairs:

Nike Zoom Kobe IV (White Varsity Purple) - So, so durable, I still use these for outdoor ball
Reebok Team Question Mid (White/Red) - Got these in NYC when AI came back to the Sixers. Still so icy, never been worn
Vans 106 Vulcanized (Purple) - I initially wanted to keep this pair in good condition, but no deal
Pointer Mathieson (Navy) - Got me through a lot of different trips, and is in surprisingly good condition after a recent clean. These have even survived being covered in melted cheese and tomato sauce from Harry's!

Song: MGMT - Kids

First heard this song towards the end of 2008, and from then until halfway through 2009, this song was inescapable. My quintessential summer 2009 song, since I immediately associate it with some of the best times of my life. It's definitely climbed up my "favourite songs ever" list!

Other memorable songs:

Drake, Kanye West, Lil' Wayne & Eminem - Forever
Lykke Li feat. Drake - Little Bit (Remix)
Feist - Brandy Alexander
Kanye West - Amazing
Kanye West - Welcome to Heartbreak
Kanye West - Paranoid
Kanye West - Street Lights
Chairlift - Bruises
Matt and Kim - Daylight
Matt and Kim - Good Ol' Fashion Nightmare
Regina Spektor - Eet
Kid Cudi - Alive (Nightmare)
Kid Cudi - Day 'n' Nite (Nightmare)
Kid Cudi - Pursuit of Happiness
MGMT - Electric Feel
Ratatat - Seventeen Years
Empire of the Sun - Walking on a Dream
Bag Raiders - Shooting Stars
Santogold - Lights Out
An Horse - Company
An Horse - Warm Hands
An Horse - Camp Out
Bon Iver - Skinny Love
Bon Iver - Blood Bank
Land of Talk - Some Are Lakes
Blue October - 18th Floor Balcony

Album: Kid Cudi - The Man on the Moon: The Legend of Mr Rager

As described here.

Academics:

My last year of study! 2009 was my Honours year, the culmination of my University degree. It was actually a REALLY fun year, definitely not as stressful as anticipated. My Honours supervisor was so incredibly accomodating. She made life so easy for me! I loved testing the First Years and thinking, "Aww, scrapping for Experimetrix credits. I was once like you!" Writing the thesis was hard, but not debilitatingly so. The feeling of finishing my thesis and handing it in was downright euphoric. All in all, a pretty successful year, nerd-wise.

Games:

To be honest, 2009-2010 was a black hole in gaming. I went from constant gamer to someone who occasionally played pick up on NBA 2K9. No winner.

Recap:

Retrospectively, I can say that 2009 was one of the best years in my life. From one of the busiest summers ever, to the two-month streak of 21st birthday celebrations, to the Lakers winning the title, to falling in love with my best friend, to finishing my thesis (and my entire degree!) and eventually culminating with seven weeks in NYC. Take that, all other contenders for Best Year Ever!

Memories:

Crazy New Year party at Cristian's
The Hives concert
Sydney Festival First Night
Jamberoo
Port Stephens trip
Beach trips!
DCfC concert #3
So many 21sts, all awesome
Angles taking me out on my birthday!
Near weekly drop-bys from Niggs
Becoming an honorary Villareal with the amount of time I spent with Pat
The endless rollercoaster saga that was my relationship with Angles
JAMP time, all the time!
The Lakers making me proud to be a die-hard fan
My first colitis attack and the resulting trip to Emergency. Scary
Getting our new America Bulldog puppy and naming him Kobe
Getting into a car accident with Pat, and thankfully not getting hurt
Nights spent with V/Red Bull/Dare Iced Coffee while I worked on my thesis
Finally handing it in, ending my Uni degree!
More concerts: La Roux, Lisa Mitchell, etc
Taronga Zoo
Wicked
Touching down in NYC and immediately getting scammed
Waking up in Manhattan for the first time
New York burgers all day, everyday
Shopping in SoHo
Watching my first NBA game, live. In Madison Square Garden, too!
Watching Kobe play, in person. Can finally strike that off the bucket list.
Exploring NYC on my own
NYE in NYC, watching the ball drop in Times Square

So many memories. Can't believe it's been three years...

Quote to sum up 2009:

"Love you to the bones, my dear."

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

And I don't know how I'ma manage if one day you just up and leave.

2011-11-27T02:31:00.001+11:00

2:30AM.

Finally alone, on a balcony, with a full drink and a full ashtray to keep me company. Just me and my thoughts, and I have a lot of 'em right now.

I've got a lot of things to figure out. Now's as good a time as any to start.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Pursuit of happiness

2011-11-24T18:47:00.001+11:00

Had a moment last night while I was sitting in the living room, so high, so chill, with Solo Dolo playing in the background. I was there in a room full of people, but I couldn't help feeling lonely for a split second.

"Listen good, I don't have nobody. This is what I fear are the sounds of sanity."

Momentary lapse. I'm in a much better state of mind this morning.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

I'm alive.

2011-11-23T15:16:00.002+11:00

Flyleaf - All Around Me

My hands are searching for you
My arms are outstretched towards you
I feel you on my fingertips
My tongue dances behind my lips for you

This fire rising through my being
Burning I'm not used to seeing you

I'm alive, I'm alive

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

My hands float up above me
And you whisper you love me
And I begin to fade
Into our secret place

The music makes me sway
The angels singing say we are alone with you
I am alone and they are too with you

I'm alive
I'm alive

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

So I cry
(Holy)
The light is white
(Holy)
And I see you

I'm alive
I'm alive
I'm alive

And I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healing

Take my hand
I give it to you
Now you own me
All I am
You said you would never leave me
I believe you
I believe

I can feel you all around me
Thickening the air I'm breathing
Holding on to what I'm feeling
Savoring this heart that's healed

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Both sides of the story.

2011-11-22T09:03:00.004+11:00

Good news:

• My mood appears to be lifting, albeit slightly.
• We won our first game of the season yesterday!
• Inching closer to the beach house. Two more days! Al...most...there!
• Belief in humanity was bolstered last night when a stranger invaded my world and dropped random items out of boredom. I'm worried this may have effectively nerfed the next few bosses (given I took down the Bell Gargoyles in 4 hits), but I can always just unequip.

Bad news:

• Still feeling fairly pensive. Not out and out despondent, but more...quiet. It's weird. I'm not sure if I like it.
• Still scared of making contact. Definitely need to grow a set and just go for it. You never know until you ask.
• Exhausted. Maybe playing Dark Souls until 1AM last night wasn't the best idea. I couldn't help it, I just needed to try that new gear!
• Long day of work ahead. Imminent despair...
• Weather for Thurs - Sun looks horrible, sunshine-wise! So much for getting a tan =(

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Gregory and the Hawk - Boats and Birds

2011-11-21T08:33:00.004+11:00

If you be my star, I'll be your sky
You can hide underneath me and come out at night
When I turn jet-black, and you show off your light
I live to let you shine
I live to let you shine

But you can skyrocket away from me
And never come back if you find another galaxy
Far from here, with more room to fly
Just leave me your stardust to remember you by

If you be my boat, I'll be your sea
A depth of pure blue just to probe curiosity
Ebbing and flowing, and pushed by a breeze
I live to make you free
I live to make you free

But you can set sail to the West if you want to
And past the horizon, 'til I can't even see you
Far from here, where the beaches are wide
Just leave me your wake to remember you by

If you be my star, I'll be your sky
You can hide underneath me and come out at night
When I turn jet-black, and you show off your light
I live to let you shine
I live to let you shine

But you can skyrocket away from me
And never come back if you find another galaxy
Far from here, with more room to fly
Just leave me your stardust to remember you by

Stardust to remember you by

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Mayer

2011-11-20T23:22:00.002+11:00

"All you need is love...

...is a lie."

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

On hyperawareness and progress

2011-11-20T14:55:00.005+11:00

Cox: "...right now, all I see is a guy who's so worried about what everybody else thinks of him that he has no real belief in himself."

I came to the realisation today that I'm someone who puts way too much stock into what other people are thinking, how I'm viewed, how I come across to other people or whether or not I made a good impression. Amongst other things.

Normally this wouldn't be a huge issue if I could manage this in a normal way, not let myself get wrapped up in thinking about it and should things turn out negatively, be able to walk away and say, "Oh well, it is what it is."

To be fair, I think I'm getting better at doing all of the above. But on days like today, when I went out on a limb (an extremely tentative limb at that) and things didn't go as planned, I still feel the sting. And I need to process the idea that it's not always going to go my way, that I need to develop thicker skin and most importantly, that I need to find things about myself I can be happy about.

This is coming from a guy who is no longer afraid to take the last shot, to take on an angry customer, to be in the same room as an emotional client, to meet new people, or to be in an uncomfortable situation where I feel anonymous. Just looking over the past year, I know I've developed a sense of confidence in myself, mostly by throwing myself into things I would never have even considered doing in years past. This is just one of those things: I need to be able to put myself in these situations and not buckle at the fact that it didn't go my way.

I just need to be patient. It'll happen, and I don't need to rush. Judging from my luck the past few months, it'll be here soon enough.

I initially planned on writing a(nother) pessimistic and cynical post, and now I'm ending it on a high note. Progress.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

It's been awhile...

2011-11-17T09:36:00.003+11:00

New resolution: I will try to write for at least half an hour everyday. In some way shape or form.*

I've missed this. I'm not the most creative person but I always liked writing as a way to express myself. More often than not, it serves as my channel for catharsis.

Quick recap of major events since October 2009:

• I fell in love and had my first proper relationship. We're no longer together and it was a really intense period in my life, but despite all the crazy and honestly depressing things that happened, I'm still really glad it happened. I learned a lot about love, women and myself, and when we were good, we were amazing. That's what I'm going to take away from it.

• I visited the city of my dreams and lived there for seven whole weeks. New York was everything I wanted it to be. I think I was tailor-made for NYC, given that three of the biggest aspects of the city's urban culture (basketball, hip-hop and sneakers) are three of my favourite things in life. I'll be back soon, I promise.

• I graduated and earned my degree. And then I was brought back to Earth by the reality of looking for work. Luckily, after eight long months, I finally got a break. I've been at my current role for over a year now. It hasn't been perfect, but I love everyone that I work with. I'll have to move on eventually, though. That'll be a sad day!

• I joined a gym. This wouldn't be a major thing for some people, but coming from someone who used to be a tub and refused to do any exercise other than basketball, this was a big step. I grew up with hilariously bad eating habits, and I don't want to carry that into adulthood. I want to be healthier.

I know that there's plenty more that's happened over the past twentyfive months, but those are the biggest things I can think of, or am willing to write about.

It's a good start. It's great to be back.

- marty..

*This does not apply to my day job (or as I like to call it, "Those eight excruciating hours between Dark Souls sessions").

END COMMUNICATION.

Extremely relevant, right now.

2011-11-16T21:04:00.002+11:00

I'm watching Two Guys and a Girl (sidebar: I miss this show!), and Berg and Irene just had this exchange:

Berg: I consider myself to be a good person, you know, and I'd hate to think that there's somebody out there who doesn't feel the same way.

Irene: Oh, so everyone in the world should love you?

Berg: I don't think that's too much to ask!

I love it when a line from a song or show sums up exactly what you're thinking/feeling, or helps you explain why you feel so affected by a situation.

Don't worry Berg, I know e x a c t l y how you feel.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

This stings a little.

2011-11-16T08:37:00.005+11:00

It's been over two years since I've felt compelled to write anything. I kept telling myself I'd get back to it, and given that the most significant parts of my life occurred during my hiatus, one would think I would've found plenty of inspiration to write again.

I find myself back here because of a mistake (surprise, surprise) and how the consequences of my actions are troubling me. In the grand scheme of things, it's probably something that would fade over time, but for now, it's causing me to doubt things about myself which I previously held to be ironclad.

Like the fact that I'm a nice guy. I know I can be a jerk, but most of the time that's in jest. But this is one of those times when I feel like I've embarassed people I care about and given them second thoughts about the kind of person I am. And that's not easy to face. I used to take pride in being a stand up guy, and now, I think I have a lot of growing up to do before I can believe that about myself again.

I'll give myself some time to get over it. Hopefully once everything settles down I get a chance to sincerely apologise to people and prove that (99% of the time) I'm a good guy. And I hope that my next few entries are written from a much sunnier perspective. Amen?

- marty..

P.S. Soundtrack for this entry:

Bon Iver - Woods
Death Cab - Some Boys
Kid Cudi - Mr. Rager
Lykke Li - Hanging High
Nirvana - About a Girl
Dios Malos - You Got Me All Wrong
Yellowcard - City of Devils

END COMMUNICATION.

Simple as that.

2009-10-08T02:24:00.004+11:00

"And if that snowball starts to pick up speed, God forbid, you’d better tuck and go, my friend.” - Dr. Perry Cox

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 4 days.

END COMMUNICATION.

Up Up and Away - Kobe Bryant: Top Dunkers.

2009-10-07T03:47:00.004+11:00

Jimbo Jones and Kid Chino have each posted clips of their respective favourite players booming on people's heads. My turn: make way for the Black Mamba. Attack, conquer.

Let me just throw down the gauntlet now to Fonz and Jim: I'm taking the crown with the Kobe and the Lakers once 2K10 comes out!

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 5 days. Ahh, F-word.

END COMMUNICATION.

Once upon a time, nobody gave a f*ck.

2009-10-06T14:55:00.004+11:00

Good to be around the gang again. I know we only went for about about a week without seeing each other, but when it comes to our group, that's an eon and a half!

I can't wait 'til Fourth Year's officially dunzo. Maybe I'll chuck a party to celebrate? Or it could possibly double up as a going-away party before I leave for the motherland.

Anyways, happy 22nd birthday, Reyes! Glad to see you enjoyed your night. =D

Some selected happy snaps:

Cheers!

This is what happens when you do the shower dance. Tables break, beer gets wasted.

Money shot!

For your entertainment!

Big, massive group photo time!

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 6 days. Coming through in the clutch.

END COMMUNICATION.

I got ninetynine problems, and they all b*tches.

2009-10-03T16:28:00.004+10:00

i think honours thesis is a pretty cool guy. eh kills my lief and doesn't afraid of anything.

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 9 days.

END COMMUNICATION.

People told me slow my roll, I'm screamin' out, "F*ck that!"

2009-10-02T21:19:00.005+10:00

Checklist time!

[x] - Shower
[x] - Clean room
[x] - Bottle of Beck's
[x] - Motivation
[x] - Big Dawg mode
[ ] - Thesis all done and dusted.

One thing left to cross off that list, riiiiight? Check and mate.

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 10 days. Let's get dirty.

END COMMUNICATION.

Enter GalacALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD.

2009-09-29T17:30:00.003+10:00

I'm actually making some decent headway into my Honours theALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD.

- marALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD.

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 13 days. Keep on trALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD.

END COMMUNIALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD.

The Rise of the Night Terrors

2009-09-28T05:27:00.003+10:00

I was all set to get some solid work in for my thesis, but about nine hours ago, I started to feel like this was happening in my gut every five minutes. =(

It hurts, Janice, it hurts! Waiting for another two-and-a-half hours until I can see my doctor. Until then, I'm just hoping that the pain magically disappears! Ouch.

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 14 days.

END COMMUNICATION.

The sky might fall, but I'm not worried at all.

2009-09-27T13:14:00.008+10:00

"Long before we know ourselves, our paths are already set in stone, some may never figure out their purpose in life, and some will. There are a lot of us who are caught up in this hell we all live in, content with being blinded by rules and judgment. We live in a world where it's more okay to follow than to lead. In this world, being the leader is trouble for the system we are all accustomed to; being a leader in this day and age is being a threat.

Not many people stood up against the system we all call life, but towards the end of our first ten years into the millennium, we heard a voice. A voice who was speaking to us from the underground for some time, a voice who spoke of vulnerabilities and other human emotions and issues never before heard so vividly and honest.

This is the story of a young man who not only believed in himself, but his dreams too. This is the story of the man on the moon."

The above is a spoken-word introduction to Kid Cudi's Man on the Moon: The End of Day, courtesy of Common. The album itself is amazing, but I'll get to that later on. Probably for the annual end-of-year wrap-up. For now, I'm just gonna listen to it some more. Numerous start-to-finish playbacks obviously haven't been enough.

I'll leave it to RapReviews.com to sum up why this album resonates so well with me:

"...from the depth of depression to heights of his current situation a rags to possible riches depth, not unlike some kind of hip hop Dickens. This isn't a record about getting a label chain. It's a record about panic attacks, hopelessness, depression, and rising above."

- marty..

P.S. Thesis due-date countdown: 15 days. May God have mercy on us all.

END COMMUNICATION.

Because I don't feel like doing my database right this moment.

2009-08-31T22:21:00.015+10:00

Okay, since I'm not yet in the mood to go through a ridonculous number of cassettes and listen to 120 participants' answers for the National Adult Reading Test, I'm gonna drink some beer and procrastinate the old-fashioned way - copy-paste quiz time!

Go through your wall posts and list the last 20 people to post on your wall (including status comments). Do not list any repeats; simply go to the next name on the list. Then, answer the 42 questions pertaining to the 20 names. When you're finished, tag all 20 people on the list, so the cycle can continue.

If you've been tagged, copy and paste this information into a new note and follow the directions above.

Karl Valdez (Coincidence? I think not. Karl Valdez is number one on EVERY list!)
Marione Lozano
Alfonso Pagdanganan
Angemaline Nguyen
Jes Wirawan
Michelle Renee See
Patrick Villareal
Jonathon Hooper
Kate Redoblado
Jessica Niggaheim
Julius Villa-real
Kaeann Villacorte
Gibbs Cabral
Madelaine Cabral
Ian Villareal
Maria Carmina Cabral
Valerie Tan
Krissie Mejia
RD Borbajo
Christian De Leon (...How the FUDGE did he make it to this list?)

1.How did you meet number 1 (THE Karl Valdez)?
ROFL. In English, in Year Seven. The teacher left our class alone, and we all started talking about movies. I shouted out, "Who's seen Deuce Bigalow?" and Karl raised his incredibly-built hand. We've been friends ever since.

2.What would you do if you never met 14 (Ate Mads)?
Get in contact with her through Facebook - same way I keep in touch with all my long-lost cousins nowadays!

3. Would you date 19 (Rhodri)?
With that hair? Please. I'd marry him! If only Australia would legalise marriage between people and Downy Octopi...

4. Have you ever seen 8 cry (Jono)?
Don't think so. Maybe after getting hit in the man region, sometime throughout High School.

5. Would 3 (Fonz) and 13 (Gibbs) make a good couple?
Hahaha, that would be illegal. But they WERE inseparable when we were growing up!

6. Describe 6 (Mich).
Oh, my dear cousin/partner-in-crime? Loud, proud, fabulous...uhh, we'd need a whole 'nother post to really do this one right! (WHAT UP, HOE! I FINALLY BE SEEIN' YOU THIS ECKSMAS =D)

7. Do you like 16 (Maria)?
Mah-ree-err? I love my cousin! She's awesomesauce to the nth degree. =D

8. Do you think 7 (Pat) is attractive?
Yes. His ATTRAC is at 99! He makes me lubes.

9. When was the last time you talked to 19 (RD)?
Today, I think? Or maybe yesterday...sometime recently.

10. How did you meet 5 (Joobs)?
I crashed her 18th, as a last-second replacement party guest, way back when! =D

11. Where does 15 live (Ian)?
Oh, you mean Robert Pattinson? In the hearts of all the ladies, of course!

12. What is the best thing about 4 (Angie!)?
There's no way in the world that I can answer this question properly in a blog entry.

13. What would you like to tell 11 (Julzman) right now?
I can't wait to see you in Fighting!

14. What is the best thing about 10 (Miggs)?
She tells me embarassing stories and I can give her shit about all of 'em! =D

15. Have you ever kissed 18 (Krissie)?
ROFL. Nopes!

16. What's the best memory you have of 9 (Kathleen)?
Hanging out with her and everyone else throughout Year 12!

17. When is the next time you are going to see 12 (Kae)?
Next time I walk past the TV and TFC's on?

18. Is 15 pretty (Ian)?
Extremely. That's why he was cast as Edward Cullen.

19. What was your first impression of 5 (Joobs)?
"Wow, someone who's actually lighter than me!"

20. Is 13 your best friend (Gibbs)?
I wish! What up, Gibbs!

21. Have you seen 16 (Maria) in the last month?
Yuh-huh! Saw her last week for Mum's birthday.

22. When was the last time you saw 14 (Mads)?
Waaayyyy back when. Christmas, 2003, so...almost 6 years ago! =(

23. Have you been to 2's (Marione) house?
Nope. Impossible, since she lives aaaallll the way in the Outback!

24. When is the next time you'll see 10 (Niggaheim)?
Next time we feel the urge to JAMP it up!

25. Are you really close to 12 (Kaeann)?
Naww, as a celebrity, she doesn't really associate with us commoners.

26. Would you give 6 (Mich) a hug?
Of cizzourse, I owe her three years worth of 'em!

27. Have you ever been to 17's (Vava) house?
Nopers! Why would I even want to visit? (ROFL, JOKES VA. =D)

28. Do you know a secret about 5 (Joobs)?
She attracts seeds, and she loves it! Fertile soil FTW!

29. Describe the relationship between 13 (Gibbs) & 14 (Mads).
Cousins in the Cabral Family Mafia, YO!

30. What's your friendship like with 8 (Jono)?
Too quiet, nowadays, dawg.

31. Have you ever danced with 18 (Kristina)?
That would be a nope to this one.

32. How do you know 20 (Tristan)?
Through the magic of Patty Boys!

33. Does 19 (Rory Bobo) have a bf/gf?
Yurps. He's got both!

34. Have you ever wanted to punch 11 (Julz of Seagulls) in the face?
Yeah, those times when I've felt like experiencing death.

35. Has 4 (Angles) ever met your mother?
Yup, yup!

36. Have you traveled anywhere with 2 (Marionette)?
Haha, does San Churros in Glebe count?

37. If you gave 7 (Patrick) $100 on what would he/she spend it on?
Arkham Asylum!

38. What's your best memory of 16 (Maria)?
Just all the cousinly bonding we've gone through over the last couple of years. =D

39. What is the one thing you want 20 (Tristan) to know?
"I'm sorry. I just got scared. I love you." ROFL.

40. What is the last thing you did with 17 (Val)?
Hahaha, she drunk-Skyped me to let me in on some disturbing happenings in her room.

41. Where did you meet 9 (Kate)?
Sarah-Jane's 16th, back in Year 10!

42. What do you wish for 14 (Mads)?
Peace. =) And that we could all hang out sometime soon!

- marty

END COMMUNICATION.

UPDATE: I left this question 'til last, came back to it after doing everything else. I've come up with an answer, although I could probably come up with a trillion more that would qualify. Anywho, the best thing about Angles is how, just through how she is, she loves you so much that you BELIEVE that you're amazing, ten feet tall, the king of the world, the most important person in her life. Her presence and warmth and incredibly caring nature really does that. Anyone who's met her can attest to that. But, like I said, so many different qualities can go in this space. This one just happened to spring to mind! =) <3

We Fight/We Love

2009-08-23T02:55:00.004+10:00

And it, and it begins, he walks outside for a cigarette break
And thinks, "How many cigarettes does it take?"
He takes a long drag with the sun in his eye
He squints, he thinks, he starts to sigh
Sometimes, he cry
When he think about his girlfriend on his side
She held him down, she made him better
Fought the love, through the fucked up weather
And she thinkin' about her life
With no more work, just being a wife
But instead her love, she gave it to a man
Who fought against her lovely plans
So when she go to work, plus go to school
Plus fight the love, she must feel like a fool
She want the ease that come after pain
She fights for love, that's her campaign
We fight, we love

We fight and love so much, sometimes
I get confused on who we are
Maybe if we just stop and chat a bit
We'll find out who we are

(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit
(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit more

We just keep on...

(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit
(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit more

And it, and it begins, he's off the ball
He left his friends, he ain't home no more
He's in a place, that's far away
Where he can't understand what they say
They say salaam, they carry bombs
In crowded places, and cause alarm
You're the infidel who's uninvited
But really, an American boy who's slighted
It ain't your fault, you want identity
So you join this big fraternity
You get to travel the world, it's cheaper than college
And you get guns and you get knowledge
Lookin' for your soul, and WMDs
You can't find nothing, 'cause it's empty
You got your gun, and he's your friend
And he's your man, until the end
We fight, we love

We fight and love so much sometimes
I get confused on who we are
Maybe if we just stop and chat a bit
We'll find out who we are

(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit
(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit more

We just keep on...

(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit
(Fight) just a little bit
(Love) just a little bit more

- marty..

P.S. Note to self: if you could be a little less unreliable, that'd be great. Maybe you wouldn't drive so many people away, too.

END COMMUNICATION.

Ahh, F-word.

2009-08-16T12:04:00.003+10:00

So, Patrick and I got T-boned on the way back to his house last night, around 6PM. We were exiting a roundabout when a lady in a Commodore failed to give way (her fault, HA!) and clipped the left side of Pat's car, and we spun and hit a telephone pole. Luckily, and praise be to Jesus, we both escaped without a scratch.

The damage to the car, right after the accident:

When we managed to make it back to Pat's, scary-sounding engine and all. I shudder to think how effed we would've been had she been going a little bit faster, or if she'd hit Pat's car a little bit closer to the front.

Totally scary to think that, had the circumstances been even a LITTLE bit different, we could've both been in a world of hurt. But, looking on the bright side, I'm just stoked that we're both completely fine.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Weekend in August

2009-08-12T12:24:00.012+10:00

Had a pretty cool couple of days last weekend, August 8-9. Not crazy in the "Holy shizznit, what the hell did I get up to last night?!" kind of way, but more because a lot of big things managed to cram themselves into one random August weekend.

Most important thing first, Mum got back from her annual well-deserved holiday in the Phils. Can't put in words how much I love having her back home.

Ma came back with bounty for me, even though I asked her not to get me anything. Ma loves me like that!

These are just insane. I'm never taking these out of their boxes. Hell, I'd take 'em with me to my grave if I could.

Early Saturday morning, Fonz and I lined up at Foot Locker to get our mitts on a second pair of the Air Jordan III True Blues. We got there at 8:45, not really expecting a massive line. And hey, we were right - the only three people there were myself, my brother and Jimbo Jones the photographist. We kinda kicked ourselves at first - "Man, we probably didn't even need to line up!" - but then the store opened, and some dudes came in ten minutes later hoping to cop the ONLY size 9s in store. In other words, the pair we had our eyes on and had spent the last ten minutes figuring out whether we wanted to cop (since Fonz is a 9.5). From the look in his eyes as he watched us buy the only pair of size 9s, and as he realised he was about ten minutes too late, we figured we'd made the right choice in lining up. HA!

View from the other side of the glass, around ten minutes before the store opened. Booty (and beauty) comes in the form of brown boxes.

They're heeeeere! I've wanted these since...2003? 2004? Whenever I first saw Kob' rock 'em with the ill blue & white Lakers throwback unis.

Jump, man.

Nothing in the world like that new shoe smell. No lie - I could probably get high off it.

Double time. One pair's 9.5 (to be kept on ice) and the other's 9 (to be broken out and used on special occasions).

UGHCK!

Okay, technically these weren't from the weekend - I copped 'em on Thursday night. But I couldn't resist chucking these on the blog. I went shopping with Patrick on Thursday night, ostensibly for clothes to go with a cocktail dress code. Of all the things I could've bought, like say a proper dress shirt, or a nice jumper, or a decent jacket, I ended buying shoes. 'Cause like, the other 100+ pairs wouldn't have done the job properly.

Other big news of the weekend: we finally got our new puppy! He's an American Bulldog, named Kobe (like there was any other option?). He's a little terror right now, but he'll grow out of it.

LeBron the Labrador, on his last full day of having free rein over the backyard.

Just chillin', as he does.

Oh, hello new puppy with the droopy eyes!

Man, the first meeting between these two was intense! Bron kinda went nuts, but not in an aggressive way. Just a typical reaction to having another dog in his territory, I guess? But they settled down (or tired themselves out, either one) after a while.

Staredown!

My parents with their two other sons.

Smile, guys.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

JAMP Camp at Bundeena!

2009-08-06T14:02:00.007+10:00

Pictorial time! A week late on this, but better late than never, right?

Us in boardies (and Pat in undies). It's a beautiful day!

The underwear tree! Fruit that you can wear!

This shot seems rather artistic. Freezing my ass off in this one!

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!

We can see your wiener and bush! No testes, though. Odd!

Right-side up is for gays!

Roll call! (Interestingly enough, our last names are actually in alphabetical order! Kinda playing it fast and loose with "interesting," though.)

"And I am finally seeing why I was the one worth leaving."

And here we have a Jessica Nghiem. It's native to the Berala region, but has also been seen wandering the Western regions of Sydney. If you see one of these around, be VERY careful - finger-biting has been observed!

He wants it all, and he wants it now.

Hey, ese! You look tired holmes, you better take a siesta!

Time for album cover shots!

'Til next time, team!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Drip/Square/Geek/...Anorak?

2009-07-25T15:01:00.009+10:00

From almighty Wikipedia:

"Nerd (pronounced /ˈnɜrd/) is a term often bearing a derogatory connotation or stereotype, that refers to a person who passionately pursues intellectual activities, esoteric knowledge, or other obscure interests rather than engaging in more social or popular activities. Therefore, a nerd is often excluded from physical activity and considered a loner by peers or will tend to associate with like-minded people."

Things that remind me that I can sometimes be the epitome of an All-Purpose Grade A Nerdasaurus Rex:

Getting amped over seeing the words "Full-text PDF" when researching articles on PsycINFO. Means that the desired article is just one click away, which saves me the runaround looking for bits and pieces of it on Google.
Trivial Pursuit, and the unabashed enjoyment of it. Adult questions next time!
Choosing a bed and a laptop instead of blue skies and sunshine. (So far. Might choose to play basketball once my stomach settles down. Would be a good way to blow off some steam!)
Sticking to Pikachu while playing Smash Brothers, and my weirdly comprehensive knowledge of Pokémon-related issues (shout out to Serebii.net; all the information I know, I attribute to my compulsive checking of that site).
Bogarting parts of Seth Cohen's personality, and (superficially) viewing him as an aspirational figure, in general.
My love for being able to explain everyday things in graph, table or chart form. Of note: Indexed; the melding together of rap and maths; The Friend Zone; chart of things to say during sex.
My penchant for Final Fantasy. Includes: a figure of Ashelia B'nargin Dalmasca, FF songs in my iTunes library and way too many man-hours devoted to researching and studying the games.
The fact that I end my blog entries (and previously, my comments, e-mails and wall posts) with END COMMUNICATION.
I find LOLcats effing hilarious. Internet memes are dangerously addictive.

I'm sure there's a lot more, but my brain is currently unable to remember. Most likely a failure at the retrieval stage of memory; I'm quite certain the encoding process went smoothly.

Oh crap, that reminds me. There's one more for the list:

Psych nerd, what up! Thank you, three-and-a-half years (so far) of being a Psychology major! Without which, I would never have brought myself to guffaw over this photo like I did the first time I saw it:

Over and out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

(Naturally).

2009-07-21T12:49:00.005+10:00

Contrary to popular belief, loud, pained screaming does not automatically result in catharsis. It can even perpetuate your frustration, or at the very least, it just simply fails to do the job everyone expects it to do. Plus, the fact that no one heard your agonising scream can serve as a painful reminder of your isolation.

Dear Mart,

You brought this on yourself. Deal with it. Screaming for help does no one any good.

Sincerely,
Mart

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

And this is when I forget to breathe.

2009-07-21T12:07:00.009+10:00

Tuesdays.

Feeling numb, feeling the pressure. Feeling sick to my stomach.

"I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take. When people run in circles, it's a very, very mad world."

What now? You know how much I hate uncertainty.

"Let me know: do I still got time to grow? Things ain't always set in stone. See, I know my destination, but I'm just not there."

We'll figure this out. We have to.

...Right?

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Songs I can't live without

2009-07-20T00:14:00.004+10:00

Scabbing this from Maria. Rules are as follows:

Once you have been tagged, you are supposed to write down 25 songs you cannot live without. You know, the ones you can listen to over and over and never get tired of. They don't have to be in any particular order. These are the songs that make you laugh, cry, think of an old friend, whatever the reason.

Death Cab for Cutie - Title and Registration
Imogen Heap - Goodnight and Go
Kanye West - Amazing
Kanye West - Love Lockdown
MGMT - Kids
The Shins - New Slang
T.I. - What You Know
Lupe Fiasco - I Gotcha
Enrique Iglesias - Escape
Gilbert O'Sullivan - Alone Again (Naturally)
Kanye West - Flashing Lights
Lykke Li feat. Drake - Little Bit (Remix)
Nas - The World is Yours
The Perishers - Trouble Sleeping
Olivia Broadfield - Don't Cry
The Beatles - Eleanor Rigby
Jay-Z - D'Evils
A Tribe Called Quest - Electric Relaxation
Kanye West - Welcome to Heartbreak
Onyx - Last Dayz
T.I. - Hurt
Nobuo Uematsu - Silence Before the Storm
Yellowcard - Ocean Avenue
Ennio Morricone - The Ecstasy of Gold
Bloc Party - This Modern Love

This was harder than I thought. Not because of having to whittle down a 6000+ song library down to the best 25, but actually, it was harder to find 25 songs I couldn't live without! A lot of songs weren't as meaningful as I originally thought they would be, so they were easy to cut out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Top o' the morning to ya.

2009-07-16T03:45:00.000+10:00

Inexplicable feeling of melancholy. Possibly brought on by being alone at 3:45AM with only an Honours thesis, the dim light from my Scarface lamp and a brain running on two cups of coffee to keep me company.

Taking a break to listen to Porcelain. I think it's hitting the spot. It makes things feel so surreal, like time slows down to a snail's pace. Aural escapism is very much appreciated at this point.

I'm in dire need of human interaction. I fear for my sanity at this point. The madhouse can't be too far off now.

(L).

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Second time around.

2009-07-14T22:42:00.004+10:00

Some of the random funny things I remember from the trip:

The argument about whether the footy was the same ball as the one we brought last year. (It was.)
Quotables from Julian Reyes, all while sounding like he had glass shards stuck in his throat - "Let's play animal alphabat;" "It's pretty clode;" "WAH-AH-AYE!"
Quotables from Teej - "BOW-RAL;" "Look at the sheeps!" ROFL, sheeps. Dude, everyone knows that the plural of sheep is shoupes!
Michael Jackson music marathons! We even had MJ impersonators in the car with us!
Apparently, my new nickname is Irish McMartin.
Patrick Villareal loves snowboarding. Especially the bruising and soreness. He craves it.
Patrick Villareal was also the rookie of the trip, so he copped his fair share. "And then the baby cames out! Martin Martin Sex! Thank you for being my friend! BRRRRIPS! ...Blips." Ahh, what a combo! See also, "Cowgirl 360," "Figure 4 Leglock" and "Piledriver."
"GET OUT OF THE WAY!" "LET GO OF THE BAR! DON'T SIT ON IT!"
Optimus Pride VS Mattatron.
Only one person can eff up making Easy Mac. Correct?
Six-hour car rides are for gays! Loves to cramp!
Daredevil = best superhero movie ever. ...PSYCHE! Flash kick from standing position FTW!
The only reason I snowboard is to get a chance to knock other people down. I'm an assassin on the slopes!
"F*ckin' fang it, Timmo/Marto/Matto/Patto! Heeeeaps sick, aye!"

Let's do this again next year, guys.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

'Cause I feel like taking off...

2009-07-04T01:02:00.001+10:00

You said I'm on a ledge. Come stand with me - I need the company.

2009-07-01T22:29:00.013+10:00

So, going by this video clip, I need a baseball bat, a car and a really awesome form of stress-release. Correct?

I'm not obsessed. Just impolite.

Also of relevance: my favourite post so far on Le Love, entitled "like i do with my feelings for you." So, she's turned her back, she's still on the fence AND she's keeping the gates closed.

Final score: Pessimism - 3; Love - 0.

Would also like to acknowledge the return of my cynicism. Welcome back. Wow, I thought I was done with you a while ago. Everything's the same as you left it last. You've been here a lot, so you should know your way around. Make yourself comfortable - mi corazón es su casa.

I'm pretty sure I don't believe in it. It's too misleading. Decepticons, roll out.

Ways to keep yourself occupied so that you avoid slipping into unwanted rumination whilst you're awake until the sun comes up:

Bury yourself in Uni work.
Clean a bunch of shoes.
Write.
And write.
And write.

- marty..

P.S. If my Spanish was a FAIL, blame the Free Online Translator!

ADDENDUM: Juno Temple = (Y) Martin Lorenzo Pagdanganan likes this.

ADDENDUM PART DEUX: Forgot to mention the return of my bad habits - "20 hours without food" and "one meal per day." Regulation, what up!

END COMMUNICATION.

Plushgun - Let Me Kiss You Now (And I'll Fade Away)

2009-06-21T14:47:00.006+10:00

I know that it's too soon
But it's the final days
'Cause playing all these games
Is just a time, to waste

As soon as I met you
It all began to fade
So let me kiss you now
And I'll fade away

You say you should be free
I know you said that once
Just tell me it'd be me
If you ever break that thought

'Cause I like you
Yeah, I like you
So I wrote this song
Now let me know then I will move along

Just find me a place
Where we can drift away
Instead of living life
Like it was yesterday

'Cause dreams like these
They always seem
To make me wait
So life can laugh at me for one more day

Maybe 'cause our moment
Just came and went
I'll still write these songs
Because I like to vent

And maybe come tomorrow
We'll forget I sent
All my thoughts of you
In binary

'Cause all my memories
Are just a single frame
If we could take a picture
Of just one more day

Let it be today
And maybe I'll say
Let me kiss you now
And I'll fade away

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Before/After

2009-06-20T10:46:00.005+10:00

Before last night: "Hell yeah, let's get started on studying for this exam!"
After last night: "...Hell yeah, let's get started on studying for this exam!"

Before 6AM this morning: "Maybe I should just get some sleep so I can study later."
After 6AM this morning: "Ahh, fuck it. Sleep is for gays!"

Before basketball: "Man I'm amped to play ball! Best way to start the day."
After basketball: "FML."

Before breakfast: "I can do this. I'm GONNA do this. Exam study WILL be done!"
After breakfast: "I'm gonna fall asleep, aren't I?"

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

What my brain tells me to help me deal with exam pressure.

2009-06-19T21:34:00.002+10:00

Replace the word "couch" with "exams" and it'll all make sense.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Going (going) back (back) to Cali (Cali).

2009-06-17T01:33:00.017+10:00

Back in February, I drew up a list of the things I've been subjected to in the five years since I became a die-hard Lakers fan. As I watched the clock tick down to 0.00 in Game Five of the NBA Finals, with the Lakers up 99-86 against the Magic, I breathed a huge sigh of relief. Why? Because I could finally add the following item to the list:

CHAMPIONS OF THE BASKETBALL WORLD! (2009)

In the words of Ross Geller, "Oh my God, it's just like I dreamed it!"

I've gotta keep it 100% - I had a few tears in my eyes when the Lakers won the championship yesterday. But hey, if you love this team as much as I do, and you lived through the last five years of Lakerdom as I have, then you'd have felt something at that moment, too.

I didn't think I'd ever get to celebrate a Laker championship in my lifetime. I don't know if I'll ever get to experience this again. But right now, none of that matters. The only thing I care about is this year's edition of the Larry O'Brien trophy, being cradled by Laker players and staff, on its way back to the Staples Center to join the fourteen other championships in Laker history.

Bleed Forum Blue and Gold.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Killing time before I get some shuteye.

2009-06-17T00:32:00.014+10:00

Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
Yeah, sure.

Have you ever been told "It’s not you, it's me?"
Nope.

Last two people to text you:
Fonz and Reyes.

Last three things you had to drink:
Orange juice, Coke and hot chocolate!

Is there someone you wouldn't mind kissing right now?
Yeah, why not?

When's the last time you said you were fine, but really weren't?
Ooh, haven't done that for a couple of weeks. I've actually been pretty good recently.

Relationships or one night stands?
Relationships.

When was the last time you wanted to punch someone in the face?
Hmm, the last time I was in one of my bitter, angry phases. So, probably a couple of weeks ago? No one in particular, I just felt like beating the shit out of someone as a form of stress relief.

Why did you last cry and when?
I can't lie - I shed a couple of tears when the Lakers won the championship yesterday.

Do you ever think about stuff and start crying?
Not anymore, but I used to back when I was younger.

Have you ever been awake for two days straight?
No, don't think so.

Who did you spend the last summer with?
The guys, the girls, the family. I.e. the usuals!

Do you have bangs?
Nopes. Almost, though. I need to cut my hair!

Are you Irish?
Nopes. I can do the accent though. Does that count?

Does anyone completely understand you?
Hahahaha. Hell no. Are you crazy? ...'Cause I'm pretty sure I am.

What is something you currently want right now?
Money, so I can afford the following things:

New jerseys for KB
True Blue Air Jordan IIIs
New HD cable
A pair of Pointers
A new jacket
Stuff from Halfsleeve. JUNE SALE, BABY! =D Might check it out tomorrow, if it's not raining.

Are you slowly drifting away from someone?
Probably? I can't keep up sometimes.

Have you chewed gum after someone else already has?
...Yes.

You just drank fifteen shots. What would you be doing?
ROFL! A few things:

Talking VERY VERY loudly.
Being an ornery bastard.
Blogging on my phone. HAHAHA.
Asking for more drinks.
Shouting in Tagalog.
Needing to be restrained.
Having an emotional breakdown.
Scowling. Always scowling.
Generally acting like a menace to society.
Passing out, after all of the above.

How long does it take you to get ready in the morning?
A good 40-45 minutes? If I'm lucky. HAHA.

Where did you get the shirt you are wearing?
The Nadal shirt? From my sponsors at Nike, of course! HAHAHA.

Are you imagining anyone naked right now?
No need! I hung out with Karl and Julz yesterday. That should last me for the rest of the week.

Something you do a lot:
Watch Friends.

How many piercings do you have?
Zero.

Do you miss anyone?
Not especially. But I wouldn't mind hanging out with people right about now.

What woke you up this morning?
My phone. Fonz messaged me to give me a heads up on the new 'Rising Sun' AJXIIs.

What's your favorite type of flower?
Venus Flytrap, baby.

Are you mean?
I can be a d-bag a-hole, when I wanna be.

What should you be doing right now?
Getting those timestamps down for my database! That, and studying for History and Systems. But on the real, fuck History and Systems.

Do you think you can last in a relationship for six months or more?
Yeah, but it'd take a lot of work and a little bit of luck. HA!

Will you get married?
Maybe. Funny, this used to be a resounding "Yes."

Ever liked someone older than you?
Hell yeah. I think I'd work better with someone older than me. But I'm not all that picky when it comes to age.

Has someone smacked or looked at your ass in the past week?
Probably sometime at basketball? I can't remember.

Do you regret doing anything this week?
No. But then again, it's only Tuesday.

Has anyone ever broken your heart?
Hmm, maybe. I don't know anymore, ROFL.

What is something that you realized today?
Wow, inputting that proxy data didn't take that long.

Do you think anyone has feelings for you?
Umm, naaaaawwww. I doubt it. But if anyone actually does, you know where to find me! HAHA.

How late did you stay up last night and why?
Hmm, 2AM, I think? No particular reason. Just up late.

What do you currently hear right now?
I changed the song on my iTunes to avoid writing down an embarassing answer for this question. So, technically, Jem - Just a Ride.

When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?
Today. Pat & Ian on MSN, Angie on the phone, Jess in person, Michelle on the phone, Fonz in the kitchen.

Who was the first person you talked to today?
Angie? Talked on the phone to discuss her exam.

Have you ever ridden a horse?
Yep! Back in Baguio, when I was five years old.

Have you ever cried so much you threw up?
Nopers.

What are you looking forward to in the next month?
Getting my testing over and done with, the official end of Semester One, the snow trip in July, people's birthdays (Julz, Jess and Ria).

Are you anything like you were at this point last year?
Heeeelllll to the no. I was telling Michelle about this when we were on the phone. A year ago, I was a jittery, emotional mess (my blog posts from May/June/July 2008 can attest to this!), thanks to exam stress, family issues and relationship problems. But this year? This time of the year is like the Bizarro version of this time last year. Not that I'm complaining, though.

Are you wearing jeans right now?
Nopes. Way too uncomfortable for this time of night!

Have you lost contact with someone you wish you didn't?
Not really. I mean, we lose track of people for a reason, right?

What's something you do when you're mad?
Listen to angry music. And drink, and drink, and drink.

Are you a patient person?
Hmm, not especially. But I can be. It just depends on what I'm waiting for.

Would you rather be mad or sad?
Mad. It tends to be more of a transient emotional state. Sadness tends to linger. But then again, I'm the type to hold a grudge, and madness often leads to sadness.

Do you ever use words like stoked, souped or sick?
Sick, every once in a while. Funnily enough, I mostly just use it when referring to shoes nowadays.

Closest green object to you:
The logo on my Dettol hand sanitizer.

What is your current mood?
Happy. =D

What do you wear to bed?
Home clothes? Jumper and tracksuit. It's cold as a mutha!

If you could go back in time and change something, would you?
I wouldn't have a clue. Maybe, maybe not?

What are you doing tomorrow?
Going to Uni to get some more work done on the database. Oh, and helping Michael with his Maths exam. As best I can, anyways; I haven't done some of this stuff in almost five years! HAHA.

What do you hate most?
Failure. It eats me alive.

What's your favorite color?
Blue, yellow, Forum Blue and Gold.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Eight more months.

2009-06-11T23:01:00.003+10:00

Final Fantasy XIII trailer from E3 2009.

Initiate jizzing in pants in three, two, one...

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Breather, for now.

2009-06-11T01:42:00.015+10:00

Sitting on the train this morning, I realised I had two options. I could get some last-minute study done for my Neuroscience exam, but then I figured this would lead to me stressing out over just how much content there was to learn, so I went with option 2: de-stressing by watching Katt Williams.

Some choice words that cheered me up by taking my mind off my impending doom:

"You done got with a n***a, now you talkin' 'bout, "You fucked up my self-esteem!" Bitch, it's called SELF-esteem! It's esteem of your motherfucking self, bitch! How the fuck could I fuck up how you feel about YOU?"

"It ain't no motherfuckin' drug. I done done the research, it's just a plant, it just grow like that. And if you should so happen to set it on fire...there are some effects!"

"This is a love seat, n***a! I can't even sit on this if I ain't in love! What kinda shit is that?"

"It is cool to get high. It is not cool to get high and eat up all your baby's cereal."

"Fellas, if you've got twenty haters, you need forty of them motherfuckers."

"We are tired of going to the laundromat, to see you in there. Your baby girl is all of seven years old. This bitch has on a wedding dress, and soccer shoes. Where the fuck is she going?! IS SHE MARRYING BLEACH?!"

"All I'm sayin', Spanish people, is if you are pushing a stroller through the mall and your child's feet can touch the ground out the stroller, let little ese walk then! This motherfucker's thirteen G*****n years old, with a cigarette and a Sidekick! 'Push it faster, ese!' "

In other news! Possible reasons why I woke up with the world's worst headache earlier tonight, before I went to the movies:

Eating expired food from my pantry. Seriously, I need to start checking the Best Before dates on all my junk food. Like that Toblerone batch that I've been munching on over the last couple of weeks? 14/5/09. Umm, ouch.
Starving myself for most of the day, and then making up for it with a massive dinner, and then going straight to bed for a nap.
Eating way too much junk food, including what was left of the giant bag of Doritos.
Lack of sleep thanks to studying finally catching up to me (sleeping at 5AM, WHAT UP!).
Trying to sleep with the heater turned way up. Loves the suffocating atmosphere!

Seriously, that headache sucked. I felt all woozy, like I was overheating or something. My mum told me to sit on the stool to get my head right, and I almost tumbled over on the other side. Lucky I managed to call Pat and ask for a lift; if I kept up the stubborn act and insisted on driving, I don't think it would've been a pretty sight.

Anywho! So long and goodnight, Neuroscience. I know that, at the start of the semester, I said I was geeked to take this elective because it seemed so interesting. Yeah well, 'interesting' ended up being just another word for 'incredibly complicated and dense subject I now regret choosing.' That exam sucked, but I'm just keeping my fingers crossed for a Pass. Flat 50, I don't care. I'm just glad it's over and done with.

Two weeks until History and Systems exam. To-do list in the meantime:

Enter proxy data into participant database. Fifty-five questions x fifty-plus participants. I'm gonna need a Red Bull or five.
Get in touch with Leigh so we can set up appointments with our older participants. Halfway through testing, baby! Sixty more to go. And then it's hardcore thesis-mode time.
Get back to Julie about how testing's going, and ask her for help with the database.
Revision for History and Systems. Most retarded Psychology course ever. The lecturer himself even attested to the same thing!
Get gear ready for the (now-annual?) July Snow Trip! Ch-ch-cheeeeaaahhh! More snowboarding injuries and embarassing video clips, WHAT UP!
Fix PS3 HD output, buy new HD cable.
Book tickets for end-of-year NYC escape almighty/reunion-with-very-much-missed-cousin-Michelle Renee See! Fingers, toes and all other crossable body parts crossed for this.

Sleeping pattern is once again wrecked thanks to exam cramming. Damnit!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Throbbing toothache of the mind.

2009-06-09T20:46:00.003+10:00

Trying to wrap my head around all of this...

...leaves me feeling like this.

Braaaaiiiinnnsss!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Distracted. Again.

2009-06-07T21:54:00.006+10:00

But does it count if the distraction's taken up a lot more time than the thing you're supposed to be doing? It's like studying's a sidetrack to procrastination. If only, though.

Anyways! I finally finished reading Let the Right One in. It's gruesome, it's gory, it's creepy, it's infinitely interesting, it's exciting, it's brilliant, it's endlessly fascinating, it's frightening. Sorry, I seem to have run out of superlatives. Point is, it's an awesome book. Reminds me of why I love vampires so much in the first place.

I also managed to get my hands on a copy of the movie. I'm THISCLOSE to just ignoring Neuroscience to watch it, especially after I had a "sneak peek," just to test if it was working properly and all. Y'know. BUT, studying must be done. I'm focusing on the fact that it's dubbed in English (rather than being in Swedish and having English subtitles, as I would have definitely preferred!) to convince myself it's not really worth giving up my Neuroscience study just to watch it. Discipline don't fail me now.

Hey, wait, where are you going? Come back, discipline! I need you! Fine! Leave me then, you filthy sonofabitch!

Sorry, gummy bears-induced outburst of weirdness. One-sided conversation over!

- marty..

P.S. Let's go, Lakers!

END COMMUNICATION.

But you don't mean a thing to me.

2009-06-07T16:41:00.005+10:00

"I think I can safely say that [Tiny Vessels] is the most vicious song I've ever written."

Ben Gibbard persisted in leaving this song in Transatlanticism, even after the rest of the band questioned whether he really wanted it on the album because of how it could make him sound like "the biggest asshole of all time."

I wanted to believe in all the words that I was speaking,
As we moved together in the dark
And all the friends that I was telling
All the playful misspellings
and every bite I gave you left a mark

Tiny vessels oozed into your neck
And formed the bruises
That you said you didn't want to fade
But they did, and so did I that day

All I see are dark grey clouds
In the distance moving closer with every hour
So when you ask "Is something wrong?"
I think "You're damn right there is but we can't talk about it now.
No, we can't talk about it now."

So one last touch and then you'll go
And we'll pretend that it meant something so much more
But it was vile, and it was cheap
and you are beautiful, but you don't mean a thing to me

Yeah, I think it's safe to assume this song would put him on the shortlist for Top 10 Biggest Asshole Songwriters of All Time.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

POW! Right in the kisser.

2009-06-05T09:41:00.007+10:00

I swear, the best part of the day has to be the moment just as you've woken up. You know, that split-second when everything is absolutely gravy...right before all your worries and troubles sneak up on you and smack you square in the face, like a Fight Night haymaker.

Right before you realise that...

Wishful thinking's brought you nowhere. It's probably the same old story that you're used to. Don't bother, hope no longer lives here.
You have a shitload of studying left to do, and not a lot of time left to do it in.
That participant database isn't going to do itself.
You're only halfway done with your testing, and you STILL haven't gotten off your ass to start contacting more participants. Euch.

On second thought, nevermind. Don't wake me, I plan on sleeping in.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Good Morning, Starshine.

2009-05-30T10:42:00.008+10:00

The Good:

I'm wide awake on a Saturday morning, having already played 3 games of ball and well-fed from a home-cooked Bacon x Pancakes combo for breakfast. Participant database and Neuroscience exam, I'm coming for you two next!

The Bad:

Thanks to this fucking rhino at basketball this morning, I'm sporting a headache and a slight bump on the bridge of my nose. Got cold-cocked with an elbow straight in the face when I went to double him. Now it kinda smarts around the bridge of my nose. Euch! Dirty motherfucker! But maybe he was just mad 'cause I got him with a clean block on a fast break.

The Ugly:

Felt something weird on my hand halfway through the first game. Looked down and saw this. HA! I tried to get a good shot of it on my phone, but this was the best I could do (thanks, Nokia N95!). Gruesome, ain't it?

Over and out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Lessons Learned

2009-05-24T13:10:00.010+10:00

Things I've learned in the last 18 hours:

I have a predilection for changing the topic of a conversation without telling the person I'm actually talking to that I've changed topics. Case in point:

Mart: [referring to Angels and Demons] Have you read the book yet?

Mart: [quickly changes topics before Crisa can answer] Oh, I've got a new vampire book!

Crisa: The Vampire Lestat? Twilight? Queen of the Damned? Those are the only vampire books I've read!

Mart: What are YOU on about? I was talking about Angels and Demons!
Mexican food is awesome. But only in small, controlled doses. And definitely not as part of the following combo: Enchiladas + Rice + Nachos + Sour Cream + Salsa + Quesadillas + Chicken Caesar Salad + Heineken + Popcorn + Starburst + Brandy Alexander. My stomach was destructificated after last night.
Angels and Demons is a pretty good movie. I was initially averse to watching it 'cause my recollection of The Da Vinci Code went a little something like this:

I'm part of the X-Men. I'm Professor X because I can use my mutant powers of high-level telepathy to manipulate such things as automatic doors and electronic boomgates. But sometimes, when the mood strikes me, I can also be Wolverine. Fear my adamantium claws, bub.

If you drink beer and pass out in your bed, you may end up accidentally giving your friend, also asleep on your bed, a brutal knee to the face. What a way to wake up, right RD?
But hey, if you think "blunt trauma to the face" was a nice wake-up call, how about the house alarm going off 'cause Fonz didn't think I was at home, so he armed it before he left? That's a MUCH better way to get woken up! Nothing like annoyingly loud blaring sirens to rouse you from your morning slumber!

Okay, back to real life. Participant database, here I come!

- marty..

P.S. Let's go, Lakers!

END COMMUNICATION.

LAL-DEN Game 2 notes - We don't need no steenkin' home court advantage!

2009-05-22T17:24:00.021+10:00

This is my first attempt at taking down notes while watching a game. I'm not lobbying for a job on SLAMonline or Forum Blue and Gold, but I always wanted to do one of these things.

I gave Mike a buzz and asked him if I could drop by to watch Game 2. Just before I left, I looked at my laptop, and the thought of taking notes popped into my head, so I brought it along out of impulse.

(Sidebar: If I was this dedicated to taking notes at Uni, maybe I wouldn't be so worried about my exams...but hey, that's neither here nor there.)

Let's go, Lakers! *clap* *clap* *clap clap clap*

First Quarter –

Nuggets miss a free throw early. Thoughts of Game 1 proceed to flash through my head.
Michael: "Derek Fisher is a shitty point guard." I proceed to defend Fish.
Ariza with a three! If he gets hot early, then we can put this away by halftime.
Dahntay Jones with 3 fouls. Awesome. I’ll see you in the 2nd, dude.
Let’s go Drew! If you have a breakout game, I’ll buy a Bynum jersey. (But probably not.)
Laker bigs rebounding. More active. Big smiley face goes here.
Dahntay Jones with 4 fouls, 6:12 left in the game. I'd love to read Basketbawful's Lacktion Report on this game later!
Michael asks me why the fuck I’m writing right now. I tell him I’ve been blogging for five years. But this actually would be the first time I tried my hand at taking notes while watching a game.
Ad for Kobe Doin’ Work comes on. Even as a Kobe fan, I can’t find myself getting amped for this. =| I know Mamba works on his image and everything, so I don’t know how much faith I can put into it. Let’s hope I get proven wrong when I actually go to see it.
Doris Burke – Why do you sound older than you look?
Gasol with the closeout! And the tip in! ACTIVE!
I don’t hate Billups as much as I used to when he was in Detroit. I think it was just a Piston thing.
Third putback for the Lakers in the first.
Oh wow, we’re not starting a game with lethargy for once. This bodes well. But I have a sinking feeling this’ll be offset by the usual “Fuck it, we’re up by double digits. What are we doing after the game?”
Birdman sighting, 3:23.
Wonder how Spanish Marshmallow reacts once things get chippy? Let’s hope he does the same thing he did against the Celtics on Christmas Day: SHOW SOME ANGER! GASOL USE ELECTRIC! YOUR ELECTRIC, PAU, USE YOUR ELECTRIC!

(Image from YAYsports!)

‘Multiple “My bads” get you beat.’ – JVG
Kobe with a runner off the glass. B-e-a-utiful.
Home cookin’. Tastes delicious.
MACHINE INITIATE TERMINATOR MODE. RUN FOULBILLUPS.EXE.
Kobe has 12 with 40 seconds to go.
Kleiza with a three to stem the tide. Back down to 6. When are we gonna start ripping their hearts out?
MACHINE INITIATE ALMOSTDAGGER.EXE
Lakers by 8, end of 1. Looking good, but I’ve had my heart broken by the Lakers’ complacency way too many times.

Second Quarter –

George Karl is red as hell in this interview. Anyone else curious about what he said to the Nuggets during the break?
Nuggets are playing sloppy as hell.
Six offensive boards for the Lakers. See what getting pushed around by Houston does to you?
Couple of trips back and forth without a bucket. Until ShanWOW! gets a tough floater in the lane.
Mark Jackson suggests replacing Jerry West with MJ on the NBA’s logo. I love Mike, but you can’t disrespect The Logo like that.
Melo can’t get going (1-6, so far). Adjustments are a bitch. He even misses a freebie!
We’re seeing some movement and passing from LA. Crisp and slick. This is the pretty shit I’ve gotten spoiled with over last two years!
Nice elbow to Birdman’s face, Drew.
Melo with another. Getting hot?
And another.
And another! Hot it is.
Mike: “I reckon [Kenyon] was high when he got [the Neck Lips] tattoo. Had to be.”
The Nuggets fall asleep on the break and Drew gets an easy dunk, + the foul. In. Ex. Cusable.
I don’t know if it’s our defense or just the Nuggets being sloppy but they can’t keep a handle on that ball out there. If I had an Internet connection, I’d check the box score for the turnover count so far.
If we close this quarter out STRONG, then I think I might guarantee a victory early.
Damnit, who gambled on that play and left a man open?!
Fuck, down to 8. 1:42.
5. 1:09. 8-0 run. COT DAMNIT.
Stupid explosive Nuggets offense. Nuggets cut it down to 3.
“How does a kid from Lithuania who lives in Maryland go to college in Missouri?” – More JVG.
So. How’s that “closing the quarter out STRONG” going?
Aaaaaand down to 1. Last 30 seconds.
After Lamar wets a J, he blocks Billups to close out the half.
...Or so it would seem. With three seconds left, Billups banks the inbounds pass off Kobe’s back and hits the layup. Sonofabitch. Los Angeles, 55. Denver, 54.

Third Quarter –

Can we respond, get back to basics? Or are we gonna fold under Denver’s newfound intensity?
Get up, PAU!
Melo ties the game with a J over Fish (FISH! WHY IS HE ON MELO?).
Okay, maybe a little bit TOO unselfish on the floor. Passing the ball around too much leads to the 24-second violation.
Dahntay with five fouls in eight minutes.
Mike warns me not to throw my thongs around if the Lakers start slipping, as I tend to do whenever I'm losing in NBA 2K9. I hope it doesn’t get down to that point.
TREVOR ARIZA! Attacks the rim and finishes strong.
Ahh, fuck. He just went down hard. But he’s back up on his feet. Great work out there, kid.
Hopefully Kobe uses the end of the first half as fuel for the second.
Kobe Bryant just got away with murder on that rebound! RIVERSIDE, MOTHERFUCKER!
Chauncey’s pull-up three on the break. You see it coming, and all you can do is cringe as you hear the splash.
Kobe. Baseline. Jam.
Gasol’s brought it this game, effort-wise. The dirty hustle side of basketball only ever looks pretty when it’s your team doing it.
Uh-oh, 10% battery life left. I’m switching to blogging via my phone. This does not bode well for me. 71-75. 2:47 in the 3rd.
MVP chants as Mamba steps to the line. Wishful thinking sucks, but thanks anyway, Staples!
Nice effort, but the refs fucked up on that call. Maybe it's to make up for Kobe's rebound/Push of Doom earlier.
Good board! Now, let's get a good last shot.
Or, an ugly-ass jumper from Shannon. That too. 81-80, Lakers.

Fourth Quarter -

Damn, Kobe's got 4 fouls with 11:23 left. Gulp.
Obvious quote of the day: "1-1 and 2-0 are two VERY different scorelines."
Denver regains the lead on a Kleiza trey. Let's not give this guy a chance to get his confidence back, shall we?
The bounces start going the Nuggets' way.
Officially scared. Down 7 with just over 9 minutes to go.
Kick ball? FUCKING SERIOUSLY?
Back-to-back threes to bring us back to 1 takes the edge off a little bit. Whew.
This looks like it's going down to the wire. As a basketball fan, I couldn't be more amped. But, as a Lakers fan, I'm shit scared right now. But I'm guessing the players are coping with the pressure a lot better than I am.
Mike: "Walton's all over the place!" That he is.
Pau + Electric = ELECTRIC PAU.
Penalty already? Are we even halfway through the fourth yet?
Whew. If we win, Trevor gets the game ball. For real.
Free throws. Might wanna make those, team.
Kobe with a three to tie. He's fairly good at this basketball thing, especially in the last few minutes.
Crafty move by Chauncey to draw that foul.
Another shot by Kobe to tie. Ho-hum, do something else you bum.
NECKLIPS with a two for the lead. Ergh. Of all people!
And Trevor loses the ball. What an unlucky way to lose. Bad non-call by the refs to miss the JR Smith violation. Damn.
Chauncey misses a free throw to make things interesting, but good ball denial from the Nugs ensures that the only look we get is Fish for a contested three from the corner, with Nene all up in his personal space.
Dunzo. 106-103, Nugs.
Remember all that stuff about the Lakers always breaking my heart by blowing a big lead?

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

And the birthday streak comes to an end.

2009-05-17T17:54:00.024+10:00

One of the craziest things about having friends in so many different circles is that for two months of every year, from the middle of March up until the middle of May, there's at least ONE birthday celebrated each week. It's a pretty hectic streak, when you think about it.

Let's get this started, shall we?

Kate's 21st - March 19, 2009. Zachary's, Kings Cross.

Loves to smile!

Groupthink.

It's the sleazy look!

Happy birthday, Kathleen!

Teresa's 21st - March 27, 2009. Trinity Bar, Surry Hills.

Oh, it's the guys.

One of these guys decided to coat my car door with vomit. Guess who?

Oh! Harro Patrick! Would you like to play "Drink 'til you sleep?" Loves to get the high score!

Jessymica's 21st - March 28, 2009. Narnia!

I don't know how many of these costumes were actually from the 90s...but damn, Cristian's costume is awesome!

This photo weirds me out. Whoa, Nelly.

Jessymica and some of her loyal subjects.

Kaeann's 20th - April 3, 2009. Casa di Nico, King St. Wharf.

...Okay, so this is the only photo I have from Kae's. HAHA.

Katrina's 21st - April 4, 2009. The Croft!

ROFL. To be fair...I was drunk. Look at Kate, though, wishing she were somewhere else right about now!

Pat & Ian's 21st - April 9, 2009. Mounty County!

The twins, plus their folks.

Got arrested by Officer Sukit!

Dirts McGirts. Hectus magectus!

Mattitude's 21st - April 11, 2009. Albion Palace Hotel, George St.

ROFL. It's the infamous Party Scowl!

Almost a complete group shot!

Umm...Vogue?

Party, p-p-p-party people MATT!

Angie's 21st - April 14, 2009. Hog's Breath Cafe, Blacktown.

Cristian, you seem to have an RD growing on your head.

My giant ice cream, MINE!

John's 18th - April 18, 2009. Rooty Hill.

Hey, it's the Mart ghost!

Karl's 21st - April 26th, 2009. Braza Churrascaria, Leichhardt.

World's luckiest cake. Gets mouth particles from Karl John Valdez!

Always guaps, that Karl!

Ice cream cake! Destroyed by sugarlust from a couple dozen diners.

Most accurate drawing ever.

Jes' 21st - May 2nd, 2009. Wagaya Restaurant & PJ O'Brien's.

"Hey dude! There are people trying to get through!"

Guaps McPogs Squared.

Love, right there.

"TWENTY-ONE! TWENTY-ONE! PDA! PDA!"

Patrick uses Headbutt! ...It's super effective!

Mart's 21st - May 8th, 2009. The Croft. [Umm, let's skip this one. I've talked about it enough.]

Cristian's 21st - May 15th, 2009. South Hungarian Club, Glendenning.

There's that Party Scowl again!

Is it just me, or do my cousin and I look alike?

SB Twin sandwich!

Trendsetters, baby!

All three Jesses in the one photo. May God have mercy on us all!

I think this one was taken in my cul-de-sac. Maybe. Possibly. Details are hazy around this point!

...Aaaaaand, DONE! Can't wait until we do this again next year, guys. I'm so used to partying with everyone on the weekend, but now it's time to buckle down and get some serious Uni work done.

That, or catch up on sleep. Both options sound good!

Let's get these exams out of the way, and hopefully we'll all see each other again for Julz' birthday!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Sound arguments are definitely my forté.

2009-05-13T23:14:00.003+10:00

Suburb names that sound like they belong in the outback:

StrathFIELD
AshFIELD
BurWOOD
FOREST Lodge
Surry HILLS
LilyFIELD
Summer HILL
YOWIE Bay
Terrey HILLS

I'd go on, but I can no longer be bothered. Basically, if it has HILLS or FIELD in it, it sounds like it's from the outback. The funny thing is, these places are all close to the CBD.

Mart Logic thus dictates that as judged by their names, these places count as part of the outback. BUSH TOWNS!

Okay, back to my regularly-scheduled insanity.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

These are the sounds of not being able to sleep.

2009-05-13T01:16:00.003+10:00

Infusion of new music into my iTunes to keep me entertained, awake and alive.

"Third time's a charm, baby! After two classics, another stripe up on my arm, baby!"

Clipse - Kinda Like a Big Deal (feat. Kanye West)

"Right now, if looks could kill, you'd be a killer. A sexy f*cking killer, babe."

Black Eyed Peas - Boom Boom Pow (Remix) (feat. Kid Cudi)

"'Cause I'll pull down a cloud for you. I'll circle the stars and bring you one back. I'll walk through the sun for you. 'Cause there's somethin' you do that's got me walkin' on the moon."

The-Dream - Walking on the Moon (feat. Kanye West)

"Stop, pop, jumpshot. So sporty! Yo, I tried bein' average, it's just not for me."

The Cool Kids - Pennies (Remix) (feat. Ludacris & Bun B)

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

kidcatastrophe Presents: Twentyone, Bitches.

2009-05-10T10:52:00.027+10:00

Selected happy snaps from both parts of my amazing twentyfirst. Much love to everyone who made it down and made it special, by the way!

Part 1 - Tuesday, May 5, 2009. Angemaline took me out to Bondi/Vaucluse for lunch, hanging, good views, walkabouts and general happy snapping of photographicals.

I remember this place! =D

Looking good in a bib since 1988.

The lighthouse. We managed one good shot out of about...a billion?

View from a random bench.

Got the Harbour Bridge in a shot!

If I ever decide to become a musician, at least I'd already have my album cover taken care of.

"This is where they keep the deformed babies!"

Got special assistance from PAM, the Toyota Starlet. Who says we aren't resourceful?

Final shot of the night, while PAM was taking us back home.

Part 2 - Friday, May 8, 2009. Partying up in The Croft. All of my family and friends under the one roof. And an awning. And the stars.

The greatest banner ever made in history. Hyperbole aside.

My brother, and my *big* sister. I call this one "DOOMside Style," with the ciggie and drink for the unborn child.

Oh, new Kobes, courtesy of my big brother? Yeah, that one took me by surprise.

Okay, now show me "Unbridled Joy!" That's it, now just stay still!

Ankle insurance.

Mart + Mum + Fonz.

I can just picture what they're plotting in this photo. Sheils' smile gives it all away.

Someone snapped me trying to open Jimbo's present. Everyone stuck to the Purple and Gold theme, I see.

One of these is Fonz, and the other one is Jim. If you can tell which is which, I'll give you...respect and admiration. Valid in all states and territories of the Commonwealth!

All Hail Team Villareal.

Hiding underneath my table, clutching a bottle of Karloff. What, you guys don't do that on your birthdays? Well, maybe YOU'RE the weird ones, then!

Hiding in my laundry room, clutching a bottle of Karloff. What, you guys don't do that on your birthdays? Well, maybe YOU'RE the weird ones, then!

3/4 of the Awesome foursome of the night! Kae + Jess = combination I'm very, VERY afraid of.

First one there! And first one to actually fall asleep...before any of the other guests even got there. Haha!

Ahem. I won't put up any pics that actually have Maddison in 'em, but let's just say...BOOM BOOM POW.

View from the best seat in the house. Sans the stripper.

Sother and Mon.

My niece and my little cousin. Prim and proper. Until the sugar kicks in.

Oh, surprise Sheils! It was your birthday, too! =D

OH! It's the guys! (Minus a few.)

My alcoholic cousins!

So many things wrong with this photo. When did this happen, by the way?

"If Wilden strips, WE RIOT!"

Finally! Oh, and there's a penis on a red hat. Umm, okay.

T-Pain and Timbaland showed up to my party. Beat that!

Somewhat subdued, still.

That's what big sisters are for! Getting drunk and taking crazy photos on your birthday!

Last-minute leavers. Of course, I was asleep by this point and missed out on the fun. =( Not cool!

Never understimate how much I love each and every single one of you awesome homo sapiens.

- marty..

P.S. By the way guys, thanks. I did have a Happy 21st. I did enjoy my night. You guys do love me. HAHAHA. And to whoever came up with writing that a billion times over on the painting, thanks! ROFL. Cracked me up the next morning.

END COMMUNICATION.

Not like they'd ever read this, but still...

2009-05-08T05:26:00.007+10:00

Dear parents,

It's 5:30AM. I, Martin, your second-born son, am still awake due to a History and Systems essay.

If you happen to walk into my room and find me sitting there, lights off, tackity-tacking away on my laptop, please rest assured that everything is alright. I'm just trying to get this over and done with as quickly as possible so I can get some semblance of rest before the big twentyoneth birthday celemabrations.

If, however, you find me "asleep," please vacate the room as quickly as possible as I'm actually only pretending to be asleep, 'cause I'm shitscared of coming up with an excuse as to why I'm still awake. I know you guys always get worried when I nocturnalise and all, and I have to devote my mental resources to polishing off this crappy, crappy essay. If I've gone ahead and ducked under the pillows, please buy into the deception and walk back outside the room. Then and only then can I get back to half-arsing my assignment.

Love always,

- marty..

P.S. Thanks for setting up the party and all. You guys are the fucking greatest!

ADDENDUM: Tried to sneak into the bathroom ninja-style, to minimise noise. Right hand, meet bathroom door. Silent household, meet banging noise. Safe to say I won't be on TV for my ninja skeelz anytime soon.

END COMMUNICATION.

Let's take it back.

2009-05-07T13:21:00.003+10:00

Unofficial item number 6 on my birthday wishlist: that I could be a dumb little teenager again. But only for the cool stuff that we love to reminisce about now. I'd cut out all the lame things that make me cringe.

Seriously though, the late 1990s/early 2000s were the hot shizznit. Whenever I read through my old copies of The Source/XXL/Vibe, it never fails to take me back.

More to come later, possibly.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

I don't know why it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really...

2009-05-06T08:53:00.003+10:00

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

It's 2009, and I refuse to come wack.

2009-05-05T18:36:00.002+10:00

"Stern, firm and young, with a laid-back tongue. The aim is to succeed and achieve by twentyone."

-- "Jazz," A Tribe Called Quest

Eight things I'm proud of:

Making it this far without any major, major screw-ups. Y'know, nothing for my parents to be embarassed about.
Having the same best friends now that I had back when I was eleven.
The fact that my brother and I have lived together for twentyone years and aren't constantly at each other's throats. Far from it, actually!
Making it to Uni, getting into the Honours program and being THISCLOSE to graduating.
How much I've changed since I was younger...and at the same time, how not much has actually changed at all.
Having a ton of people I can actually consider as my close friends.
How I once got my entire grade to chant my name in unison. Rock star status, WHAT UP!
Managing to convince numerous people (friends, supervisors, teachers, markers) that I'm actually smart. Using big words works wonders. Alliteration, word?

Five things I want for my birthday (now with 900% less materialism and superficiality!)

Love. From my family, from my friends, from strangers, from whoever. You can never get enough love.
Wisdom. Preferrably the kind that gets me better marks at Uni.
A greater sense of spirituality. I think this one requires more effort on my part. Uh-oh.
A better grasp of how to properly handle tough situations. Mainly, not resorting to dramatic outbursts and downing uncomfortable amounts of scotch. HAHA.
A more blunted sense of emotionality. Two important issues: being able to let go more easily and avoiding any overreactions to the smallest things (be they positive or negative).

Three things I wish I could've done differently:

Worked a lot harder during the first three years of Uni. I know my marks have been good enough so far, but that's my problem. I've always settled for "Good," when I know that if I work my ass off, I can get that all the way up to "Fucking Awesome." I can't fathom what my marks would be like if I decided to go all out instead of being lazy all the time.
Handled issues properly to avoid alienating people. I have people now that I'm not exactly cool with. And not like I'm begging them to come back, 'cause I'm enjoying life without 'em. But at the same time, it'd be awesome if we all put everything aside and found a happy middle ground. I don't know, though; on my part, it'll take erasing years and years worth of friendships and starting over. And my bionic memory just won't let me forget.
A bunch of my relationships go in this space. I can't hold on to a romantic relationship for any substantial length of time if my life depended on it. It's always one thing or another. ROFL. But I guess it's not all bad. All the mistakes so far are just a part of one ginormous learning process. I'm working on it, and I'm working towards something better. It'll all pay off, someday. Amen?

- marty

P.S. I'm writing this post now and letting it auto-publish Tuesday, at 6:36PM. Why then? Because we're three hours ahead of the Phils, and I was born at 3:36PM on May 5, 1988. Exactly twentyone years. Y'know, more or less.

END COMMUNICATION.

See, I know my destination, but I'm just not there.

2009-04-28T13:45:00.003+10:00

The kid is slightly bemused at how things are turning out.

The kid is leaning a little towards despondent.

The kid should really stop being so curious and suspicious about everything.

The kid needs to stop getting so caught up in the little things.

The kid just needs to stop sweating every single detail.

The kid can't wait for his birthday, but is dreading the crash that always comes immediately afterwards.

The kid is slowly, but surely, growing into an angry, bitter, cynical and resentful young man.

The kid knows what needs to happen; he just doesn't know how to go about doing it.

The kid had a lot more to write about, but it's all fallen out of his head now.

- marty..

P.S. The kid knows that he'll be a lot less ornery by the time his birthday rolls around.

END COMMUNICATION.

It's here.

2009-04-26T12:14:00.000+10:00

Amazing from kwest on Vimeo.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Two more weeks, baby.

2009-04-24T16:31:00.005+10:00

Eleven days out from my birthday, and a fortnight away from my party, I'm putting up a preview of my birthday playlist. I picked most of these out a good two months ago; I love my birthday like that.

Warning: there will be a lot of Kanye played on that night. I've loved him for five years. You should be used to it by now.

Jay-Z - Izzo
Kanye West - Good Life
Kanye West feat. Young Jeezy - Amazing
Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West - Put On
Lupe Fiasco - I Gotcha
Jay-Z - Roc Boys
Q-Tip - Gettin' Up
T.I. - What You Know
Eve - Let Me Blow Ya Mind
OK Go - Invincible
The Notorious B.I.G. - Juicy
DMX - Party Up
MGMT - Kids
Santogold - Shove It (Switch Remix)
Bloc Party - This Modern Love
Yellowcard - Ocean Avenue
Coldplay - Viva la Vida
Sleepy Brown - Margaritas
N.A.S.A. - Gifted
Gorillaz - Feel Good Inc.
blink-182 - What's My Age Again?

Can't. Fucking. Wait.

Way too early for coherent thought processes.

2009-04-24T08:29:00.004+10:00

I know HIMYM hasn't been all that funny lately (early Season 4, I'm looking right at you), but I kinda dug this exchange between Barney and Marshall. Or maybe I was delirious from waking up at 7AM, I don't know.

Barney: But let's be clear. I don't love her. I just...miss her when she's not around, I think about her all the time and I imagine us one day running towards each other in slow motion and I'm wearing a brown suede vest.

Marshall: You ever gonna tell her how you feel?

Barney: No! Maybe. NEVER! I don't know.

Barney then attempts to chug down an empty glass of whatever he'd been drinking (I'd like to think it was scotch, but that's only because I'm out of scotch myself).

...Shut up, it was funny to me.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Mamba x Yeezy = WIN^EPIC.

2009-04-20T23:51:00.004+10:00

Quickie entry before I get some sleeps. Just wanted to say that THIS is possibly the greatest article ever written in history. Y'know, excessive hyperbole aside. But hey, you can't go wrong with the following formula: the Lakers winning a Playoff game, mentioning Kobe having a great game and, to top it all off, adding in references to songs and lyrics from, ahem, Mister Kanye Omari West. AHEM.

"Bryant finally engaged for a stretch in the second quarter, toying with Kyle Korver and CJ Miles, then shaking his head and making 'he can't guard me' faces at Kanye West sitting courtside. 'That's my man,' Bryant said. 'I'm a huge fan.' "

Kobe, a Kanye fan. Somehow, that just seems to make sense. This is awesomeness to the nth degree, for real.

Anyways, one down, fifteen to go. Let's do this.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

I might explode...someday, soon.

2009-04-20T09:20:00.012+10:00

The kid is a lot more than just catastrophic. He may also possibly be:

Irascible: Catch me in a bad mood, and I may verbally eviscerate you for doing so. Venomous. Vitriolic. Likelihood of explosion varies inversely with amount of sleep, and directly with how annoying you are.

Cynical: Expects the worst in every situation. If there's a chance that something will go wrong, then it probably will. Possible byproduct of ridiculously low self-esteem. Or maybe, a lifetime of being an optimist continually proven wrong has taken its toll on me.

Bitter: I have a lot of angry thoughts brewing in my mind. Seems like nowadays, I'm perpetually ornery. I just need to let it out in small doses, instead of massive explosions (or, in my case, alcohol-fueled nervous breakdowns in the middle of the City).

Neurotic: Exhibits an overboard level of anxiety about situations. As irrational as my thought processes can get, I still stick with them. Maybe this ties into my cynicism idea? But as the motto goes: "D.T.A. - Don't trust anybody."

Determined: I know it takes me ages to get through things that I've started, but *most* of the time, I'm bull-headed enough to try and finish them. Matter of fact, you can pretty much change this one to KidStubborn. I'm loath to give up on something, just 'cause I always want (read: need) to be right. You can't tell me nothing.

Irreverent: Looking for someone who screams mean, disrespectful and crude things to others, just for the sake of shock value? Look no further. Hell, some people even call me Hitler nowadays.

Insane: I'm crazy. I'm talking, voices-in-my-head, conversations-with-myself, kind of crazy.

- marty..

P.S. I don't necessarily believe in all of the stuff I've written above. Some of 'em are just thoughts floating around in my head that I needed to get out before it overwrote important things. Like, say, my Honours thesis.

END COMMUNICATION.

Got away safely!

2009-04-13T02:19:00.005+10:00

Oh, too much loves to blog! I figure now's as good a time as any, especially since this PS3 Update is ridonculously large and kills my life!

It just hit me not too long ago that I had a little bit of a movie marathon today. Three movies might not sound like much of a marathon to an actual movie buff, but for someone like me, who has a millisecond-long attention span, that's saying something.

And I realised it was probably a good idea to get out of my own head for a while. I love how movies take your mind somewhere else for a couple of hours and force you to focus on something other than your own life. So, for me, it was great to be fixated on something other than paranoid thoughts, petty issues, friendships (and their potential endings), embarassing things I might've done over the weekend, dead ends and the nerve-wracking prospect of being an EXPERIMENTER for the next couple of months. Y'know, amongst other things.

I started off with 27 Dresses. No, don't laugh. It wasn't by choice. I was vouching for a horror movie, but my cousins vetoed me by way of majority, and picked out a rom-com. But hey, at least I got to see fine ass Katherine Heigl get with...Cyclops. HA.

Moral of the story: Just put Katherine Heigl on screen, and honestly, I don't give a shit; she can just stand there for three hours doing nothing for all I care. I'm down.

Then I had some quality Karl & Julz time, and we watched Notorious. Worth the hype. As bad as some of the casting choices were (Puffy and Tupac, I'm looking at you), others were spot on (Biggie, Lil' Kim and Faith, I'm looking at you. Faith, especially. Word!). As a Biggie fan who was too young to actually live through his prime, and as someone who up to now had only really heard the Death Row side of the story, it was a trip to see how they played everything out. Definitely one for the collection.

And now, for the finale. If you want to experience escapism in a movie, you can't do much better than Street Fighter. Yup, this one. This movie is in the running for the Best Unintentionally Comedic Movie of All Time. And with lines like these, it might not even be close.

Bison: You have made me a very happy man.
Colonel William F. Guile: And next, I'll make you a dead one.

Bison: For you, the day Bison graced your village was the most important day of your life. But for me... it was Tuesday.

Colonel William F. Guile: That bastard Bison! I know you like to look at yourself on television, you sick son of a bitch. So look at this!

Honestly, after that shit...it's a wash. Made me scratch my head, cringe and, most importantly, laugh over and over again. BEST!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Surveys are the new cop-out entries.

2009-04-08T21:11:00.005+10:00

10 things I wish I could say to ten DIFFERENT people right now:

1. I love you! ROFL. In exactly what way, and just how much, I'm not exactly sure yet. But I'll figure it out soon enough. Don't expect me to tell you about it, though.
2. I really want to come kick it with you. Mostly 'cause you're really cool and we have a blast together. And that's me looking on the bright side of it, for once! If things are gonna change, it's on you though.
3. I'm pretty jealous, damnit.
4. I REALLY wish you would stop smoking, dude!
5. I REALLY wish you were coming to my birthday! HAHA. But I understand. It's Coldplay. We'll see each other soon enough.
6. It's good to have you back, buddy.
7. Sorry it has to be so awkward, but it's better this way. Don't you agree?
8. If I could hang out with anyone in the world, I'd hang out with you. We'd eat good food, go everywhere, have Friends marathons, and just chill 'til the sun burns out.
9. I love how close we are nowadays!
10. Hi, I've seen you around Uni for the past three years. Don't take this the wrong way, but you're probably the most beautiful person I've seen in real life. Anyways, see you around!

9 things about myself:

1. I need to catch up on sleep!
2. I'm susceptible to voluntary hunger strikes.
3. I'd love to punch someone's lights out one of these days.
4. I can't pay attention to save my life.
5. I think hypocrisy's fun in small, controlled doses.
6. I wear my heart on my sleeve. And around my neck, hanging from a big dookie rope chain. DOPE!
7. I wanna get older and skip straight to the times when a good life's already been guaranteed. Surprises, NO!
8. I wish I could bottle things up more easily.
9. I wish I could dunk. How mad would that be?

8 ways to win my heart:

1. Buy me shoes.
2. Or a Kobe jersey.
3. Call me Julz or Karl.
4. Share my taste in music.
5. Be more mature than me. I'm a brat. It's fun.
6. Just don't be a bitch. At all.
7. Be female.
8. Be alive. HAHAHAHA.

7 things that cross my mind a lot:

1. [insert name of whichever girl I like at the time here].
2. Man, I am hungrous.
3. Confidence, Pagdanganan.
4. Fuck, is anything due tomorrow?
5. Is anyone looking?
6. [insert random lyrics here]
7. Remember that time when...?

6 things I do before I go to sleep:

1. Cram for assignments/exams.
2. Give up on assignments/exams.
3. Brush my teeth.
4. Put on a DVD.
5. Set the sleep timer on my TV.
6. Set my alarm.

5 people who mean a lot to me (in no particular order):

1. Mamba.
2. Yeezy.
3. Hova.
4. HBK.
5. Chanandler Bong.

4 things I'm wearing right now:

1. T-shirt.
2. Basketball shorts. As always.
3. Burden of awesomeness.
4. A smirk

3 songs I listen to often:

1. Kanye West - Welcome to Heartbreak.
2. Kanye West - Amazing.
3. Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West - Put On.

2 things I want to do before I die:

1. Get a pair of Penny Foams.
2. Get as built as Julz Valdez.

1 confession:

1. I like to look at myself on the television, because I'm a seek sonuvabeech.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

No-brainer...right?

2009-03-11T13:51:00.003+11:00

How's this for growth and getting my priorities straight: I'm skipping an NBA doubleheader on Friday afternoon (with the Lakers playing, no less) to meet up with my supervisor Dr. Henry and discuss how to improve my thesis. If that doesn't say, "I'm working on being a grown-ass man this Honours year," I don't know what does.

(Actually, getting a job might get the same point across, but that's neither here nor there.)

I'm gonna have to settle for catching the replays when I get home. If anyone, ANYONE, ruins the score for me on Friday, let's just say...Gyro Drive, SMASHER! FINISH!

Anyhoots, five minutes 'til Neuroscience starts. Call me a geek, but I'm actually amped for this class. I'm hoping my ampedness keeps me awake, seeing as I haven't actually eaten today. Ouch. Brain, don't fail me now!

- marty..

P.S. Man, I wish I could play a better Cammy, so I could main her. Oh well.

END COMMUNICATION.

Distractions

2009-03-01T23:31:00.005+11:00

This video clip's been seared into my memory ever since I first watched it a week ago.

I'm using this as motivation for getting my work done soon. The sooner I'm dunzo with it, the sooner I can get down to playing this game. Priorities, WHAT UP!

I've never been a fan of Yu-Gi-Oh!, but I swear to Buddha, this made me ROFL. Officially makes me a geek, I know. To which I say, SHAM! SHAMMITY SHAM SHAM! Take that, binky boy.

And finally, I can't WAIT to watch these movies.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

In-de-structible.

2009-02-20T04:46:00.004+11:00

Moment when I realised I was addicted to Street Fighter IV: this morning, while I was on the train on the way to Uni. I was trying to get some shuteye, and for a little while, I was doing okay. Then, out of nowhere, I just shot awake and stayed that way. Why?

Because I was trying to figure out whether Sakura's Sakura Otoshi was an EX move, and whether the EX part was for the kick or the punches.

Umm. Yes. After everyone left tonight, I played it for a good...five hours or so? Indestructible, indeed.

- marty..

P.S. Seth can fornicate himself with an iron stick. Cheap bastard.

END COMMUNICATION.

...Cincuenta?

2009-02-07T13:59:00.018+11:00

I don't think twentyfive is enough. I'm gonna see if I can bump that list up to fifty. I'll probably pick and choose the twentyfive best/most interesting to post on Facebook, if I ever do decide to post it there. Also, still undecided on who exactly I'm gonna choose to tag.

I hate gossip magazines/websites. My bathroom's full of the magazines, thanks to my brother's girlfriend's affinity for them. I'll read 'em when I'm in there, but only as a last resort, if I don't have any issues of SLAM or Complex lying around. And only because I NEED to read something while I'm in there. I just don't see the point in the whole celebrity gossip scene, personally.
Speaking of things I need to have, I dislike showering in silence. I always blast music while I'm in there. I used to have a CD player in the shower, but my mum got this iPod player for free, so now I have my whole music library to choose from. It. Is. Awesome.
When I was younger, I used to be obsessed with making sure everything in my room was synchronised, time-wise. So, I used to pull out my Digimon (...ahem), set the time on my stereo and press the "Finalise" button at the exact moment that the second timer moved from :59 to :00. Y'know. Synchronicity.
Speaking of obsessive habits, I always used to set the time on my VCR clock (the most prominent source of time in my room, seeing as it's in HUGE neon green digits, right at the foot of my bed) and on my G-Shock SEVEN minutes early. Why seven, I don't know. But having it early always gave me a sense of reassurance. Like, "Dude, you're not that late. Chillax. The clock's fast."
I can't remember when this started (probably sometime around Year Seven?), but everytime I see a set of numbers, I'm compelled to add them together and see if they add up to five. I also feel a weird sense of satisfaction when I see numbers that do add up to five. I think I've memorised the different combinations of numbers that add up to five. (Like, 77 would add up to five, seeing as 7 + 7 = 14, and 1 + 4 = 5. I'm weird like that. Don't mind me.)
I love roller-coasters. I never used to, but the feeling of going ridonculously fast while still being completely secure is just hard to beat. Sadly, I haven't been on a good roller-coaster in God knows how long.
I love isolation. I hate isolation. It goes back and forth.
Speaking of which, my mood can swing back and forth pretty quickly. It doesn't take a lot to push me to the extreme in either direction.
I've been blogging for four years now. Four years. In blog form. That's like, a fifth of my life. Insanity.
I love making lists. Possible byproduct of slight OCD.
i used 2 type lyk dis on MSN...full shorthand n evrythin... But nowadays, it gives me the shits. I don't know why, it just does. Personal pet peeve.
I've seen my favourite band perform my favourite song in person twice in my life. Thrice, if they play it again on the 26th of Feb. The first time I heard it in person, I felt like all my birthdays had an orgy and produced a super birthday. True story.
I have a habit of appropriating mannerisms/behaviours/speech patterns from my favourite characters. It's been mentioned more than once before that I pretty much bogarted Chandler Bing's personality.
I love The Wire. But I can't bring myself to watch the last season. Not because I don't want the show to end, but just because Sidereel loads too slow whenever I try to watch it. Annoying.
I spent almost the first ten years of my life in the Phils. So, whenever my mates talk about typical Sydney childhood staples, I'm pretty much out of the convo by default. But I'm not mad; I loved growing up in the Phils.
I have a very simple diet. It consists of pork/chicken, rice and orange juice. Noodles get thrown in there every once in a while. Same with fruits and water. But for the most part, I stick to what I love.
I have a love/hate relationship with epic games. I love the sense of grandeur that comes with a long game (like Final Fantasy or GTA), but at the same time, I find it so much harder to get immersed in a storyline nowadays, compared to when I was growing up. As much as I love a long game, I only really enjoy it once I'm close to finishing everything. On the other hand, I can play sports games (okay, just NBA 2K9) all day long. No story, aside from trying to replicate whatever crazy feat Kobe pulled off that day.
My favourite colour's always been blue. In recent years, yellow has made its way up the list, too. Green's at a close third.
Growing up, I always wanted to be a chef. Then I realised I'd rather eat than cook. So I settled for having a chef as one of my best friends.
I used to commonly experience sleep paralysis, sans the hallucinations. It used to scare the shit out of me. But since I haven't felt it in a while, I kinda miss it.
I used to drink a lot, and always for a reason. But after seeing and feeling way too many hangovers, I've decided to avoid crossing that line from "buzzing" to "I'M NOT A FUCKING DOG, I'M A FUCKING MAN!" Moderation, what up!
I like being out of the house, if only for the fact that it means I get to dress up and change out of my home clothes.
I personally reckon that Rachel Bilson is one of the most beautiful women alive. But that's just me. It's a subjective thing. Also, Natalie Portman and Stacy Keibler are right up there.
I've watched every episode of Friends at least ten times over. Sometimes I'll watch an episode just to see how many lines I can quote. Also, The One With the Embryos is still the best episode ever.
I almost always have a song in my head. If I could have a soundtrack playing in the background while I went on with my life, that would definitely be on my list of "Best Things Ever."

Peace.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Veinticinco.

2009-02-06T11:44:00.013+11:00

So, my cousin tagged me on Facebook with one of those "Write 25 Random Things About Yourself" notes. This sounds like a good way to kill some time before the Lakers-Celtics game, so I'm gonna give it a shot. And since I don't really know who to tag yet, I'll put it on this first, then copy-paste it onto a note later.

I'm a neat freak. I can't function properly when disorder's afoot. It's too distracting.
Speaking of which, I'm very easily distracted. Case in point: I'll open up all the files I need to get through, tell myself "Oh, I haven't checked the scores today," which leads to "Oh, I wonder who's online?" and eventually "Oh shit, it's 3AM. Why the hell haven't I started?"
I'm a Psychology major. I chose it because it has NOTHING to do with any of the subjects I did in the HSC.
Then again, I read more about basketball than I do about Psych. SLAM, ESPN, random NBA blogs, you name it.
I think I lie too much. But then again, much to my chagrin, I'm pretty easy to read. So I'd say I'm pretty easy to catch out when I do lie.
I told my cousin that I considered myself introverted, and she laughed in my face. I can be, though, when I first meet people.
I hate the heat. I hate summer weather. I like summer because it's time away from Uni and everything, but I'd much rather be rugged up on a nice, cool Autumn day. Plus, my birthday and the NBA Playoffs are in Autumn, so it wins.
I have a pet labrador, named LeBron. I love him. But I wish he was smaller so he'd be easier to play with inside the house.
I have a bad habit of starting things and not finishing them. It bugs me that I do this. So I make it a point to try and finish what I start, even though it takes me eons to do so.
I treat my shoes like they're my kids. My brother and I both started early; one of the best things about my life is how I've spent three quarters of it immersed in shoes.
My family is very important to me. No matter how anti-social I can get when I'm at home.
My list of favourite people that I don't personally know: Shawn Carter, Kanye West, Kobe Bryant, Chandler Bing, Eminem, Shawn Michaels.
I have pride issues. I'm very stubborn. And I hate being wrong.
Also, I can get very competitive. It's not as bad as other people, but damnit, if I get riled up, I'll go right back at someone. I've been known to throw things around the room in a screaming fit if things don't go my way.
I try to stick to what I know how to do (not necessarily what I'm good at). So basketball is the only sport I actually play. I have too much pride to play other sports.
There are too many songs on my iPod. I think I've only listened to a good 75% or so. Ouch. But the songs that I have listened to, I actually really like.
It takes me ages to like artists/albums. I hardly ever like something right away. I usually need a good three or four listens before I start really digging the music.
This theory, of course, does not apply to girls. KidSlowMover.
I have a routine for the summer. I wake up fairly early, pull my laptop into bed, check the NBA scores, read basketball blogs, go through other miscellaneous blogs, then clothes/shoe sites, then my e-mail, and then I eventually get out of bed and blast some music while I clean the house. THEN I'm ready to start my day.
I've still never had a job. There's a good reason for this. If you know me, you'd know it.
I would appreciate a job though. If only because it'd ease some of the financial stress around the house...and I can get new shoes.
For someone without a job and on Uni holidays, I still don't get THAT bored. Well, for a couple of weeks I did. Then, Honours readings hit. POW!
I miss my cousins. You know who you are!
My dream job, even though I have no journalistic experience whatsoever, would be writing for SLAM. I don't care if it's just answering Trash Talk or one-liners for NOYZ. That magazine is my bible.
I'm gonna go outside in the 40-degree heat and play some basketball. Yes. The lengths I will go to just to get a run nowadays.

Peace.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Of obsessions and irrational traditions

2009-02-05T22:12:00.007+11:00

As the Playoffs came around last year, with my Los Angeles Lakers standing atop the Western Conference for the first time since I became a fan, I knew I needed to do something special, to represent on another level. Something to epitomize the deep-seeded obsession I've had since junior high, since Kobe hit those 12 3s against Seattle. An obsession that had spanned, up to that point:

The Horry miss in Game 5 (2003)
The Malone and Payton experiment (2003-04)
The 0.4-second miracle (2004)
The tragic Pistons series (2004)
The Shaq trade (2004)
The Tomjanovich/Hamblen year (2004-05)
The return of the Zen (2005-06)
The 62 in three against the Mavs (2005)
The 81 (2006)
The "Steve Nash AGAIN? F*CK OUTTA HERE!" fiasco (2006)
The Suns series/collapse (2006)
The switch to 24 (2006)
The 30 in the 3rd against Utah (2006)
The four straight 50s (2007)
The Smush Parker experiment (2005-2007)
The less dramatic, more predictable Suns series (2007)
The "Ship his ass out!" tirade (2007)
The return of Fish (2007)
The emergence of Bynum (2007-08)
The Gasol steal (2008)
The MVP season (2007-08)

Since my fandom started after the Lakers kicked off the new millenium with a three-peat, it's been filled more with "Reasons why I drink" rather than "Reasons why I celebrate." So, since the future looked so bright for us that Autumn (Southern Hemisphere, what up!), I decided to start a new tradition for the Playoffs: wearing my old-school white KB8 jersey for every day that the Lakers had a Playoff game. Whether it was under a jacket/hoody, or out for everyone to see, I made sure I had that jersey on me for every single game. It worked, to an extent: we made the Finals. (Then I kinda blacked out, some things happened, and for some reason, the Celtics were celebrating. Those couple of weeks were a blur to me, really. *shrugs*)

Anywho, the whole point of this post is this: tomorrow, at 12PM Sydney time, the Lakers face off against Boston. And I know, it's 'just' a regular-season game. But at the same time, it's not just any game. It's against the Celtics. Those damn Leprechauns. The last time we were in the building, THIS happened (Okay, repressing those memories again in three...). I just hope we beat 'em just like we did on Christmas Day (well, Boxing Day down here. Again, Southern Hemisphere, WHAT UP!). As much as I celebrated that day, I'll be, like, thrice as randy should we pull out a victory at the Gahhhden.

So, tomorrow, at 12PM Sydney time, I'm gonna pull out the jersey. It may not be the Playoffs yet, but it'll damn sure feel like it. If I'm bleeding Forum Blue and Gold tomorrow afternoon, you'll know why.

- marty..

P.S. Totally neglected reading for my Honours project to write this entry. Umm. Priorities FAIL.

END COMMUNICATION.

Lykke + Quest = WIN.

2009-02-05T21:56:00.004+11:00

It's simple maths, really. If I ever decide to compile a "Best Things Ever" list, seeing this performance in person would be right up there. Somewhere between "Spider-Man" and "Kobe's 81-point game."

...Okay, for some reason, Blogger's being really uncooperative and not letting me embed the YouTube clip. FAIL.

Here's the URL: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6SE7amhcwEI

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Not something you wanna wake up to.

2009-02-03T11:56:00.005+11:00

http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/news/story?id=3879472

If anybody needs me, I'll be drinking myself into a stupor, lamenting our lack of inside toughness and cursing the Celts/Cavs/Magic/Spurs(?). No matter how hopeful Kobe is.

- marty..

P.S. 2009-10 NBA Champions, here we come!

END COMMUNICATION.

CP3 makes a good point.

2009-01-25T08:34:00.004+11:00

Reading a Chris Paul feature in a recent issue of SLAM, I came across a quote that stuck with me as soon as I read it. As the topic of his rapid ascension into the NBA stratosphere came about, CP responded with:

"A lot of times I have to pinch myself, but to tell you the truth, I try not to. I just try to keep going, because sometimes if I take that second to stop and see what's going on, it catches up with you."

I should really adopt that kind of thinking in my life. Not because I've been immensely successful at something and therefore need to keep myself in check. In my case, when it comes to life, the little things and the not-so-little things, sometimes you just have to accept them for what they are, and not let yourself get caught up in analyzing the How and Why.

Keep it simple, stupid. Don't make life harder for yourself by painstakingly going through every aspect of your life, from the minute to the mammoth. If I can master this mindset this year, I'll have accomplished something. Because, as it currently stands, my type of thinking could do me in.

- marty..

P.S. Honestly, no pun intended about the title for this entry.

P.P.S. Hypocrisy, at its finest, is immensely fun.

END COMMUNICATION.

No commercials, no mercy!

2009-01-21T14:43:00.005+11:00

I figured I don't write in this blog enough, so here goes.

It's no secret to those that know me well that I have issues when it comes to trust. Mainly, my brain being as overactive as it is, I tend to suffer from bouts of paranoia.

In the midst of one of my compulsive cleaning sessions, my mind wandered off and landed somewhere along the vicinity of "Things I've Learned in Psych." I started thinking about the different types of infant attachment behaviours and how it may possibly account for my paranoia. Not that I'm blaming EVERYTHING on how I behaved as a child, but I still think it provides a plausible theory as to why I tend to worry so much.

I'm PRETTY sure I'd have fallen under the Anxious-Ambivalent Attachment Style as a kid. Why? Because, apparently, once anxious-ambivalent infants reach adulthood, they "fear abandonment and often distrust romantic partners' availability and commitment; they are jealous and preoccupied with emotional closeness."

Umm. Awesome. I'm definitely not that extreme, and I'm doing pretty well with controlling the crazy nowadays. But the gist of it sounds somewhat correct? Orrrr, maybe I just cracked open my Developmental Psychology textbook and decided to randomly write things down. Maybe I realise how crazy I can sound by spouting off about this kind of stuff, and I wrote this entry down to remind myself how ridonculous my train of thought can be sometimes and to bring myself back to Earth.

This pointless entry was sponsored by Martin's electric fan, old laptop and Developmental Psychology textbook (opened and read for the first time since...well...ever).

- marty..

P.S. I watched Anchorman again yesterday. LOUD NOISES!

END COMMUNICATION.

What are you made of?

2009-01-20T13:10:00.005+11:00

Secret heart, what are you made of?
What are you so afraid of?

Could it be three simple words

Or the fear of being overheard?

What's wrong?
Let her in on your secret heart

Secret heart

Why so mysterious?

Why so sacred? Why so serious?

Maybe you're just acting tough

Maybe you're just not man enough

What's wrong?
Let her in on your secret heart

This very secret that you're trying to conceal

Is the very same one that you're dying to reveal

Go tell her how you feel

Secret heart

Come out and share it

This loneliness, few can bear it

Could it have something to do with

Admitting that you just can't go through it alone
Let her in on your secret heart

This very secret that you're trying to conceal

Is the very same one that you're dying to reveal

Go tell her how you feel

This very secret heart

Go out and share it

This very secret heart

Okay, two versions. Exhibit A: Slower, more heartfelt version by Ron Sexsmith. Exhibit B: Poppier, more upbeat, and more refreshing version by Leslie Feist. Evaluate your mood, and pick your poison accordingly. As of this moment, I'm in Feist mode.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Another survey. Boo! Where's the originality?

2009-01-10T00:22:00.016+11:00

1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
ROFL. Hit a car. Drive to the city! Play with lab rats. SNOWBOARD!

2. Did you keep your new years' resolution(s), and will you make more for next year?
I didn't make any resolutions at the start of last year. So N/A for this question.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My cousin Mary-Anne, to Mia.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My grandfather.

5. What countries did you visit?
In my mind? Lots.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
Stability. Balance. Health. Better basketball skills!

7. What date(s) from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 2 - Bondi
January 11 - Jamberoo
April 3 - Hot Hot Heat/Modest Mouse!
May 3 - Jes' Birthday
May 5 - My Birthday!
May 17 - Seabellies
May 21 - OCD flare-up. Hell.
June 4 - Secret.
June 27 - Hit a car
July 5 - First time at Bidwill
July 11-13 - SNOW TRIP!
August 18 - Death Cab!
September 5 - Dinner for Angeline's birthday
September 19 - Fonz & Crisa's birthdays
October 16 - Oktoberfest
November 26 - Bloc Party
December 6 - KANYE WEST GLOW IN THE DARK TOUR.
December 8 - Got my Honours invitation! =D
December 13 - Belated Halloween Party!
December 24 - Christmas with the family
December 31 - New Year's Eve

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting marks that were good enough for Honours! =D

9. What was your biggest failure?
Letting my brain get the better of me, yet again.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Nope. In-fucking-vincible.

EDIT: Crap, just remembered. I messed up my ankle early in the year. Required mucho limping action. But I DID soldier on and play on it, anyways. Stubborn, WHAT UP!

11. What was the best thing you bought?
My Romares.

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?
Drunk Karl and Drunk Julz. HAHAHA!

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My own. HAHA.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Weekly TravelPasses. EUCH. Went up by another $3 for 2009!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Someone new in my life? HAHA. Oh, and the Lakers getting it together! The Yeezy concert, for sheez.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
Kanye West - Love Lockdown. Jason Mraz - I'm Yours. Kanye West - Amazing. Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West - Put On.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. Happier or Sadder?
About the same, I'd say? More confused, though.

ii. Thinner or Fatter?
About the same. HAHA. Maybe a TINY bit skinnier.

iii. Richer or Poorer?
Poorer. HAHA.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Snowboarding. Praying. Exercising. Chilling. Preparing.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Worrying. Obsessing. Moping. Drinking.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
In 2009? Hopefully freezing my ass off in NEW YORK!

22. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Naww.

23. How many one-night stands?
None.

24. What was your favorite TV program?
The Wire. How I Met Your Mother. Dexter. Robot Chicken. Fresh Prince.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Nope.

26. What was the best book you read?
...Indexed? HAHA. I don't read much. Can you tell?

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Hypetrak.com.

28. What did you want and get?
Romares. Tickets to concerts. Secrets. HAHA.

29. What did you want and not get?
A resolution. Stability. Mental peace. More secrets.

30. What was your favorite film of this year?
Dark Knight. Step Brothers. Sex Drive. Pineapple Express.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 20 this year. I wore my "throwback" KB8 jersey, put on my Purple Pigeons, presented a research proposal for Psychobiology, forgot to hand in a Human Rights essay, and thanked people for their birthday greetings. =D

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not screwing up good things? Although, things do happen for a reason. So, maybe let something else ruin the good things, rather than the usual suspects. Or, finding a steady girlfriend. HAHA. Oh! And maintaining my Distinction WAM.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Hopefully, a bit more grown up!

34. What kept you sane?
Basketball. Friends. Friends. Kanye West. My brother! =D

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I can't think of anyone!

36. What political issue stirred you the most?
How the politicians were handling the economic crisis.

37. Who/What did you miss?
Christmas with Michelle! Again.

38. Who was the best new person you met?
I didn't meet that many new people. But off the top of my head...Angie, Jess, Fiona, Jimbo (only ever really started talking to him this year, so it kinda counts!).

39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Learn to leave things be and just go with the flow!

40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"Where I wanna go, I don't need you. I've been down this road too many times before."

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

2008?

2009-01-08T01:32:00.004+11:00

1) Where did you begin 2008?
Woodcroft. Thirty minutes later, I was at Pat's house. Good times.

2) What was your status on Valentine's Day?
Single. Very, very single.

3) Were you in school (anytime this year)?
Yup. For eight out of the twelve months.

4) How did you earn your money?
By being awesome.

5) Did you have to go to the hospital?
Just to visit a friend, is all.

6) Did you have any encounters with the police?
Just for Random Breath Tests, thankfully.

7) Where did you go on holiday?
Jindabyne for the snow trip. Hells yeah!

8) What did you purchase that was over $1000?
Nothing.

9) Did you know anybody who got married?
I think an old friend from High School got married this year...or was that last year? Can't keep track, really.

10) Did you meet anyone famous?
Hugh Jackman waved to us at Bondi. Does that count? HAHAHAHA.

11) Best book you read this year?
INDEXED. HAHAHA. I don't read much. Is it obvious?

12) Did you move anywhere?
Nope.

13) What concerts did you go to?
Hot Hot Heat/Modest Mouse, The Seabellies, Death Cab for Cutie, Bloc Party and Kanye West.

14) Best purchase of the year?
My Romares. Still saddens me to think about how I fudged them up.

15) Are you registered to vote?
Yessir.

16) Who did you want to win Big Brother?
...I don't do reality TV.

17) Where do you live now?
The Croft.

18) Describe your birthday.
Had a presentation for Psychobiology. Also, forgot to hand in my essay. But other than that, really cool.

19) What's one thing you thought you'd never do but did in 2008?
...ROFL.

20) What has been your favorite moment?
Oh, there's been a lot. A couple stand out. Getting back in touch with a good friend is one.

21) What's something you learned about yourself?

I can actually tolerate isolation, depending on my mood.
I probably do need help, no matter how stubborn I am.
I need to stop drinking, 'cause...
...I'm an emotional drunk.
I'm a natural.
Being a killjoy isn't so bad.

22) Any new additions to your family?
MIA! And I think a couple of my other cousins gave birth this year, but I haven't been keeping up with everyone.

23) What was your best month?
May, November, December.

24) What music will you remember 2008 by?
See blog.

25) Who has been your best drinking buddy?
Not counting myself, then the guys.

26) Made new friends?
Oh yeah.

27) Best new friend?
Probably Angie.

28) Favorite Night out?
KANYE WEST GLOW IN THE DARK TOUR.

29) Biggest tragedy of 2008?
My Lolo's passing. The petty little heartbreaks don't even come close.

30) What do you hope for in 2009?

Stability. In everything: life, mental health, love, etc.
Maturity.
Less emotionality.
A greater sense of spirituality.
First-class Honours!
A Lakers championship.
More shoes.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Starting 2009 off with a bang

2009-01-08T01:32:00.003+11:00

The new year's only a few days old, and I've already found a contender for verse of the year. Granted, the song was released last year, but still. Extra-large serving (as in, 2:07, non-stop!) of wordplay and consciousness, coming right up!

"Rappers can't clap me, jackers can't gat me
original meaning of jazzy, fat nasty (?)
I don't bite rapper's lines, I bite the captain's arm off
I don't throw shots in the air, I throw that molotov
cocktail, reservoir dog, my cutter off (?)
y'all scared to get that revolution poppin' off
You really got the guns that you claim in the track?
Then my question to you is "who you aimin' them at?"
You complain that the rap police caught you with a gat under the seat
misdemeanour, that 20-bag of weed
but little old me, with the few facts that I speak
the homeland security gavel me overseas
froze my bank accounts and seize my energy
and y'all are soundscanning like a hundred more than me
they kickin' you off tour for a freak and a chicken, too (?)
verizon ditched me too, cause I was too political
y'all are all safe and shit
y'all are not saying shit
you just snap you fingers and dance and make your label rich
gotta pay back that advance, so they ain't gave you shit
this is your chance to say somethin', and you're wastin' it
people are starvin', and you're talkin' 'bout ballin'
can't think of nothin' more important than that jargon
hundred different ways to describe diamonds sparklin'
80% of kids are listenin' to y'all's shit
I heard that statistic, I almost cried
never wanted so bad for 2Pac to be alive
what the fuck happened to rap,
when the gangsters are scared of upsettin their industry masters
it ain't my place to say, and I hear all that
but fuck that, I live in the hood, and we need y'all cats
so as soon as I hear y'all on some real pro-black
then I will gladly go back to my emo rap
they say the truth don't belong to nobody
if you see it, you speak it
it would be a sin to keep it a secret
so if I need to breathe, then believe that I mean it
quit tryin' to be somebody's boss and be a leader
if it wasn't bad enough, your labels are hoe-ing you
you can't even scan, your fans are downloading you
there's no connection, so they're not supporting you
you ain't never shed light on nothing that they're going through
we ain't buying CDs, we striving to live
and these artists don't need me, they already rich
I ain't hatin' on you, rock them shines
just remember us from time to time when you drop them lines
rappers can't clap me, jackers can't gat me
original meaning of jazzy, fat nasty
busy raisin' babies and livin' on tour
signin' off, Brother Ali, sincerely yours"

-- Brother Ali, off "2nd Time Around" by Wale

Note: This is my first attempt at transcribing a verse by ear, without any lyrics in front of me whatsoever. If I've fucked up, then blame it on me being a neophyte. Or, I just really wanted to use the word neophyte in a sentence. Either one. HAHA.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

The Year in...

2009-01-07T22:50:00.029+11:00

I've already written two entries, but thanks to Blogspot's timestamp-manipulation powers, this is the first official entry for 2009. Let's keep this short and sweet, shall we?

This is 2008, the year that was, in...

...Kicks.

...Did I actually buy any shoes this year? Cutting down is the new splurging on once-a-months. I ain't even gonna lie, it was a LEAN year for my feet. A pair of the XI Lows for cheap, a clean black pair of Eras, and...that's about it! Oh, wait...

Favourite shoe purchased this year: ...My Clae Romares! Which lasted approximately one month before I made the mistake of wearing them to a drunken night out. NEVAH. EVAH. AGAIN. R.I.P. I hardly knew ye.

Final word: In an effort to save money, it's cutback time! Umm, even more so. I'll make up for it when I start working. Whenever that may be. HAHA.

...Music.

And the drill, as it's been done over the last couple of years, goes as follows: I go through my iTunes and pick out the albums that have managed to make their mark on my psyche over the past year, no matter when they were released. Then I leave out the albums that have potential, once I listen to them a couple more times. Got it? Good.

Kanye West - 808s and Heartbreak
C-San - The Birth
Death Cab for Cutie - Narrow Stairs
Feist - The Reminder
GZA - Liquid Swords
The Hives - The Black and White Album
Hot Hot Heat - Happiness Ltd.
Kidz in the Hall - The In Crowd
Lupe Fiasco - Lupe Fiasco's The Cool
Modest Mouse - We Were Dead Before the Ship Even Sank
Q-Tip - The Renaissance
Regina Spektor - Begin to Hope

Albums that I'll probably like given a couple more listens:

The Cribs - The Cribs
The Cribs - The New Fellas
The Hives - Veni Vedi Vicious
The Hives - Barely Legal
Dogs Die in Hot Cars - Please Describe Yourself
An Horse - Not Really Scared
Lykke Li - Youth Novels

Personally, I think I lacked the patience for albums this year. I kinda gravitated towards more easily digestible portions (i.e. a couple of songs per artist), as kind of a taste test to see what they actually sound like.

Album of the year: 808s and Heartbreak. No doubt about it. I know people have their gripes with this album, and I've talked at length about why I personally love it (ahem). But honestly, the main point for me is the fact that it resonated SO well with my mindset throughout this year. Let's face it, this was Kanye's emo album. And with the year I had, there was no better album to fit my disposition. It was a perfect storm of Kanye's emotional heartstate, the newfound "walling up" mentality I had throughout Second Semester and the fact that I needed an escape. Sonically, at least, I found it in 808s.

Artist of the year: Kanye Omari West. From his guest verses, to the aforementioned album, to the greatest concert in the history of mankind...he ran the show, straight up and down.

Song of the year: Love Lockdown. As soon as I heard this song, it was dunzo. In the eternal words of Kenny Smith, "It's OVER! It's OVER, ladies and gentlemen! Let's go home!" But seriously, it's the single best piece of music I've heard all year. That, and it's a microcosm of my mental state. Like, if you ever wanted to encapsulate the thoughts that swirled through my head into 4 minutes and 31 seconds of music, then this would be the way to do it. Untouchable.

Runners-up: Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West - Put On (honestly, this was ALMOST Song of the Year, until Yeezy pulled out Lockdown); Kanye West - Amazing (see Put On); Kanye/Jigga/Weezy/Tip - S.L.U. (see Put On); Jason Mraz - I'm Yours; Brand New - The Archers' Bows Have Broken

Songs to remember 2008 by: ...Okay, I just tried my hand at this. A billion songs later, I've given up. It's too hard! I've got too many songs to list. I just know that whenever I need to flashback to a certain point in 2008, as I am loath to do, I won't be left wanting.

...Academics.

Oh, what's this? An invitation to do Honours for 2009? Well, looks like I got through 2008 just fine. I know, I know, my WAM dipped below 75 for the first time in three years. BUT! On the big, flashing neon sign of a PLUS side, my grades were still good enough. Hallelujah, indeed.

...Games.

NBA 2K9
Grand Theft Auto IV
Metal Gear Solid 4
The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
WWE SmackDown! VS Raw 2009

Worst new trend: buying long (and in the case of ESIV, VERY, extremely, mind-bendingly long!) games, losing patience and then sticking to short sports games.

...General.

Welcome to Martin Lorenzo Pagdanganan, V2.0. He's exactly like he was before, but he's different in so many ways. In the past year, he's learned how to:

Be a jerk
Relish being a jerk (villainy's always fun, isn't it?)
Avoid people-pleasing and focus on himself (not that he needed any more practice with that)
Ruin a perfectly good thing
Beat a dead horse way past its time of death
Love isolation
Handle failure
Avoid alcohol, despite what peer pressures may dictate
Let his head get the best of his heart (yet again)
Avoid caving in
Value his family! One of my favourite things from this year is having a closer relationship with my brother. Hands down!

The quote to sum up my year? Take it away, Mister West, with a couple of lines from Love Lockdown:

"I can't keep myself and still keep you, too."

"Where I wanna go, I don't need you. I've been down this road too many times before."

Done and done. So much for short and sweet! Anyways, here's hoping 2K9 beats the shit out of 2K8! Over and out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION,

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-25T14:35:00.005+11:00

And since the festive season is upon us, here's my favourite Christmas song. It's non-traditional, which is probably why I like it so much. That, and it's The Eraserheads.

The Eraserheads - Fruitcake

There's a fruitcake for everybody
There's a fruitcake for everyone
There are B-sides to every story
If you decide to have some fun

Take a bite
It's alright
There's some brandy and Star Margarine to make it bright
Take a bite
It's alright
A little lovin' and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake

It's the season for being happy
But the reason is dead and gone
If the reason for being happy
Takes a backseat when the season's done

Just take a bite
It's alright
Taste the taste that sent all mothers giggling in sheer delight
Take a bite
It's alright
A little lovin' and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake

Everybody, everywhere, people do you really care?
Christmas time has once again arrived
Everybody, everywhere, people do you really care?
Christmas time has once again arrived

Mistletoe and a little snow
But we don't get it there at Fruitcake Heights
Mistletoe and a little snow
But we don't get it there at Fruitcake Heights

Stars are falling down from heaven
But it's nowhere near our town
Miracles are falling down from heaven
But it's nowhere near our town

There's a fruitcake in everybody
There's a fruitcake in everyone
There are B-sides to every story
If you decide to have some fun

Just take a bite
It's alright
Taste the taste that sent all mothers giggling in sheer delight
Take a bite
It's alright
A little lovin' and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake

Next Christmas, promise!

2008-12-25T02:40:00.005+11:00

Because I'm spending another Christmas without my partner in crime, here's a flashback vid to remind myself how my cousin and I roll. And how much fun we can have when we make asses of ourselves.

ROFL. Merry Christmas, Mich! Much love, dawg.

- marty..

P.S. Peep the unsightly haircut on late 2005 Mart. Ouch.

END COMMUNICATION.

Here's hoping

2008-12-23T14:11:00.005+11:00

I know it's about to Christmas in a couple of days, but before it does, I figured I'd write up my last-second wishlist.

A new pair of shoes. I'm thinking these Bass kicks for (relatively) cheap, or these Feits... for double the price. Financial kamikaze, indeed.
A new set of pants. Jeans, slacks, whatevers. I seen these navy Gant pants at Castle Hill over the weekend, but I decided to hold off. Hmmm.
Long-sleeved shirts. Yes, I know it's summer. I don't care. I seen some nice ones over at Incu, and I'm bullseyeing one come Friday.
A more grown-up wardrobe. A little less GP (although I don't think I've even bought anything from GP since I turned 18. Jeans aside, GP's too...y'know), and a little more GQ. Fuck if I'm not even 21 yet. I wanna roll with this "Mart looking older" mentality I've had throughout this whole year and carry it into 2-double-0-9.
Last but most, a Lakers W against the Ceatles come Christmas Day. It'll be Boxing Day here by the time I get the results, so I'm hoping I can add that to the list of good things to come that day. If I have to voodoo the shit out of the Green Machine, I'm cool with that. I'm not averse to stat curses either. Boston, you've been warned.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

20/20

2008-12-17T10:51:00.004+11:00

Now that almost all the pics from Saturday night have been uploaded (only Liezl's left to go), I think it's time for the final word on my annual late Halloween soiree. Too lazy (and sore) to blog properly, so I'm just gonna look back on my list of irrational worries and let hindsight work its magic.

"People getting bored. A dull, lifeless party is what I'm most scared of. Keeping everyone entertained is Job #1."

I think I did a pretty good job with this. Everyone kept themselves entertained with drinks, conversation, mingling, music and picture-taking. Awesome.
"Job #1A would then be keeping the house in order. This is why I stay sober at my own parties. If anything gets broken, you can find my name in the adoption listings."

Cleaning wasn't too bad this year! It was actually fairly tolerable. Plus, we kept the house itself clean, aside from needing a mop job in the morning. Other than that, good times!
"Trying to get the various disparate groups together to have fun as one party entity. Here's hoping everyone has fun mingling."

This one wasn't a problem at all. Lucky for me, I have sociable friends.
"If a lot of people sleep over, I'm not gonna have room for them. The couch is off-limits. So is Fonz & Crisa's room."

Sorry, RD and Jeanette! Pat solo-ed the bed, and I didn't even know he was sleeping over! HAHAHA.
"I might run out of alcohol again. Recurring theme at my parties."

I actually had extras this year. Well-preparedness, what up!
"Here's hoping people can actually use the bathroom this year."

Done and done. Didn't stop people from peeing in the alleyway, though.
"What if I don't decide on a costume by then?"

I managed to decide on a costume. It just got so hot that I needed to change costumes about 2 or 3 times throughout the night.
"The weather could be disastrous. Best believe my eyes are gonna be glued to the Weather Channel in the upcoming week."

Fortunately, the weather took a turn for the better JUST as Saturday morning rolled around. Hot and windy throughout the night, instead of rainy and clammy. Good party weather, mos def.

Alright, it's getting too painful to type. Might post later. Hit the big two-oh in a month for the first time EVAR!

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

'Dummy' Snippet

2008-12-15T02:41:00.005+11:00

Quick quip from Charles Hamilton:

"Shouts to the sexy waitress at Nobu / I got no boo / So, your walls, I'd like to go through / I ain't sayin', I'm just sayin' / I guess I'm Super Saiyan, like Goku"

- marty..

P.S. Peep the whole freestyle here. He automatically gets points for dumping all over Soulja Boy.

END COMMUNICATION.

HOLY FUCK.

2008-12-15T02:30:00.002+11:00

http://www.thefader.com/articles/2008/12/12/the-wire-the-complete-series-ommfg

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

kidcatastrophe Presents: A Halloween Party in December

2008-12-14T20:27:00.009+11:00

The party finally went down last night. As expected, good drunken times ensued amongst the revellers. I did my best to stay as sober as possible (and I think I did a pretty good job at it, too), just so I could maintain order around the house. I have to say, cleaning up wasn't as bad as it was last year. I love that everyone mostly stayed outside, saving me the hassle of having to tidy up the WHOLE house. Ahh, orderly drunkenness. Good times for all!

Highlights from the night:

Cristian coming as 1SikLeb, replete with body hair, bum bag and about a billion phones.
RD as Blank Man. Or as everyone else called him, "Blanket Man."
Pat's adventures with the alleyway place in my backyard. Stomach lining FTW!
Richard and his alter egos, The Bunteaser and Ricky Ricardo Monquez. Quotes include, "Hey baby, you got a spare nine months? Good, 'cause you're having a baby." and "Where is the, uhh, 'take-a-the-photos?'"
Teej + blonde wig = Mandy Spleiss.
Those bogan girls outside.
Valdez climbing my walls. Spider-Man!
Pat's Andre the Giant singlet, and Teej's attempts at being Solid Snake. "Teej? Teej?! TEEEEJJJ!" "Hey guys, open the light and cover his eyes!"
Jess Lay getting drunk to the point where she looked like she was crying/worried the whole night.
Dianne's shock gun. Ouch.
Julz and Karl driving all the way back to the party! Dedication!
RD walking into the spare room to find the sofa bed had been solo-ed by Pat.
Ange's tats. ROFL.
Cristian's back piece. DOUBLE ROFL.
Ria being the cleanup saviour for the second year in a row. (Massive thanks, dawwwwg!)
Reyes' shorts! "Hey bro, you look like you need a drawstring!"
Lette coming in in a dress...then promptly changing to dress as me. Score.
Jimbo as 50, with the bulletproof vest and all. Also, my brother as...Fresh Prince? Kanye?
Crisa and Liezl gossipping. I'm owed stories, if I recall correctly!

Selected snapshots from the soiree:

Hat - check. Oversized jersey - check. Trackies - check. Mart pose - triple check.

I'd like to think I did Juggy justice. I mean, he's just lazing around and consuming. PERFECT.

A rare picture with my Jughead costume.

Full-body shot of the Juggy. Hell, all I needed was the needlenose!

I'm Idaho! It got too hot to stay as Jughead, so I changed to one of my cop-out ideas.

Hey, it looks like I'm holding the dollar bill!

We even had a tattoo artist!

Too much co-ordination can kill you. Especially if your shirt matches your drink.

I don't blame you, Julz. I couldn't stop looking at him last night, too!

Warning: Matt makes people cry.

Photography express!

LOL. I wouldn't be surprised if our TFC's out of wack now.

"Just let me enjoy my beer and my privacy! ...But make sure you get my shoes in the shot."

Adam Bomb. I had to wear the hat, 'cause crown hair's a bizznitch.

I had white guys come to my party. Howzat!

Last song of the night before the midnight cut-off.

The party starts to wind down a bit.

Funny thing is, Cristian was completely sober.

Who could've done this?

Oh, hello Pat!

There's a fire in my mouth, and none of you are invited.

Woodcroft, we go hard! We go hard!

Morning after. This was at around 6AM, I think. RD and I were still up and walking around randomly cleaning the backyard. Sleep is for gays!

People were STILL coming by at 6 in the morning! That's how we do.

To my folks: thanks for letting me throw the party, and for cleaning up this morning. To everyone that showed up: thanks for coming, motherfuckers!

You're welcome! You're all welcome!

- marty..

P.S. To those that weren't invited, nothing personal. I just didn't have much space to work with.

END COMMUNICATION.

Morning after

2008-12-14T06:59:00.003+11:00

Okay, I've been up for the last 21 hours. My head is killing me. My legs are in so much fucking pain. I spent the last couple of hours just chilling and cleaning. I'm just sitting in the lounge with Jeanette and RD, 'cause we have nowhere to sleep. Ouch.

So, the party last night was pretty fucking crazy. More deets and pics to come soon. Must find time and space for rest soon. Peace.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Sneek Peak

2008-12-11T23:20:00.002+11:00

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Got the letter today and...

2008-12-11T00:11:00.007+11:00

...I'm in.

"On the basis of your results across Psychology Level II and Level III courses of your degree, we are pleased to offer you a place in the Psychology Fourth Year program (Session 1 - PSYC4053 Psychology 4A and Session 2 PSYC4063 Psychology 4B) in 2009."

I know I didn't get Jessica Grisham as my supervisor (and man, that would've been perfect. A research thesis on OCD? I could've KILLED that), but getting Dr. Henry is no joke. I'm excited to work with her. I mean, I remember being totally into her Second Year Assessment lectures, so I'm looking forward to learning more and writing about social psych and neuroscience in the upcoming year.

Hells yeah. Let's do this.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

KidNeedsHisFix

2008-12-09T03:08:00.005+11:00

I blocked out the blogosphere for a good 8 months or so this year, and for good reason: with life the way it was, being frugal was the best option. Thus, staying away from things that might tempt me was a necessity. Also, nothing really got me fired up for a while.

A couple of months ago, something (I don't know what; don't ask) clicked in me, and I decided to catch up and revisit the usual sites. As such, I'm back to compiling pics of shoes that fuel my fifteen-year-long obsession/addiction. With the Holidays coming up, here's my wishlist (pipe dreams, what up!). Hit the links to peep the steez.

Note: This list, of course, excludes my Holy Grail. Ahh, Penny Foams. I see you in my nightmares.

Sigh. If only I had funds to burn, I would actually attempt to buy SOME of the shoes on this list.

And I was supposed to keep this list at ten, but nuts to that. Over and out.

- marty..

END COMMUNICATION.

Checklist time.

2008-12-09T02:24:00.005+11:00

I'm doing this so that hopefully, I don't forget anything important. Things I have to take care of before Saturdeezy:

My costume. I have to decide, and decide soon. Fuck it, last-minute decisions for the win.
The food. Moms says she has me covered for chicken tenderloins, prawn cutlets, wedges, pizzas...basically small snack foods in general. But I ain't sweatin' bullets, 'cause for real, it's not a dinner party. I'll have enough to feed the munchies, but it's not gonna be a 12-course meal.
Alcomohol. I'll get this on the day. I'm thinking, a couple of bottles of something hard, plus a couple of cases of something social?
Tables and chairs. Plus, I gotta clean the backyard up a little. "MART! GET THE TABLES! ...And chairs, if you can."
Heads-up for the next-door neighbours. I've already got my speech planned out. "Hey guys, there's gonna be about thirty drunken young adults middling about on Saturday night. It might get a little bit loud and rowdy. Just to let you guys know. But don't worry, two of those thirty will be Julius Villa-real and Karl Valdez. I'll take pictures for you guys."

Over and out.